Michigan Loses on NYE: Suing ESPN for Emotional Distress

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It is a long, terrible flight from Puerto Rico to Los Angeles. I recently took it after my return from the World Cup (see Finalizing the ANA RTW Trip, World Cup & Luck Included). I won’t have to repeat this arduous journey thanks to Michigan squandering an opportunity on New Year’s Eve.

Instead of going on a wild adventure as I typically do for New Year’s (see Where to Party? New Year’s Eve), I stayed home and watched the Fiesta Bowl. Michigan made every mistake possible but fought back and had a chance to win the game. Michigan losing is not why I am upset. That happens all the time (see The Game: A Wolverine’s Guide For Surviving Columbus). Last year, when Michigan was blown out by Georgia, I was not mad. It did not affect my celebration (see Happy New Year! TPOL’s NYC NYE Party Guide). This year, it was not unreasonable to believe that we could advance. The reason I am distressed and the reason I am suing ESPN is because it had the audacity to schedule this game on New Year’s Eve.

ESPN knows that one side is going to rejoice and one side is going to be crushed. Having to deal with such disappointment, such hopelessness while simultaneously trying to be optimistic for the New Year is incongruent. I am not one for New Year’s resolutions but the coming of a new year marks an opportunity to start anew. This opportunity, even if it is only symbolic, was taken from me by ESPN. And it was taken from millions of Michigan fans around the world.

In addition to money for emotional distress, I am seeking an injunction against the College Football Playoffs being played on NYE. Have them on December 30th; have them on January 1st. Having them on December 31st is downright cruel.

Note: I am willing to take on Ohio State clients as well as they literally had to go through this agony when the clock struck midnight.

A happier time was when Michigan beat Ohio State.

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