Dear Mel,
In April of 2014 I received the bad news that you and the evil empire better known as the HOA had decided to ban all BBQs in my condo complex. With that unconstitutional notice, you took away joy and happiness of which you will never know. Obstinately, I tried to hold onto my BBQ by having roasts in the middle of the night. Your posse comitatus managed to raid these secret cook-outs and slapped a final injunction on my Weber with the caption: get rid of the grill or pay the fine.
Even with that heartless notice, I tried to rally my neighbors against you and your obtuse ways. Alas, I had no choice but to put the BBQ up for sale, hoping that someone would take it away and restore it to the days of BBQ greatness.
Now, thousands of miles away, I still think of what you did to me. My anger has subsided as I have entered a world where BBQ is not only welcomed but embraced. Here in Ulaanbaatar, I have had BBQ of all types: Korean to Uzbek, Mexican to Mongolian. All of it delicious and all available come street or saloon.
I’ve put the local authorities on notice in case you do try to impose your reign of terror on the Democratic BBQ of Mongolia. Know that this time around it’s going to take a lot more than a notice from the HOA to put this fire out.
Yours truly,
Alexander
Master Griller and Attorney at Law
