I used to proudly say that I could sit in any seat, including the middle, so long as the flight was less than five hours. Then I learned of points and decided that flying coach was not for me. More spoiled than ever, flying business is also not enough for me to get off the island (see AA SJU-MIA-LAS: Borracho in Business (First)).
When I went to book my flight for my Residency in Argentina, the only reasonable deal in terms of points was the absurd schedule of SJU-PTY-MDE-EZE (see Copa Business SJU-PTY: Passed Out Comfortably & Copa Business: PTY-MDE, More ZZZ). The worst part of the journey was the leg from Medellin to Buenos Aires. It was 6:35 in a ‘business class’ seat with no Wi-Fi.
Blocking Out the Middle Seat
When I flew from Madrid to Barcelona, I was content with Iberia purporting to sell premium economy as business. The flight was short, and the COVID concept of socially distancing passengers by leaving a seat empty was almost clever (see Iberia MAD-BCN: Some Funny Business). For an airline to use this tactic for a long-haul flight and market it as business is borderline criminal.
TPOL’s Transparency: While I was aware of this bootleg business before I flew, I contemplated whether it was better to sit back in peasant class. For 36k points, 10k points more than coach, I decided it wasn’t. But that has nothing to do with comfort.
No Wi-Fi, Limited IFE
If you’re going to stick me on a plane for this long, the least you can do is offer Wi-Fi so I can be productive. If you’re going to have IFE, perhaps have something newer than the first season of Curb or the Harry Potter series.
Food & Drink
My time on flights is spent catching up on blog posts and cataloging my video clips for my YouTube channels (like, comment, and subscribe to both: ThePointsOfLife & Alexander Bachuwa). The one exception is the first flight of the journey, which should be spent eating, drinking, enjoying, and comfortably sleeping. On this long flight, I was surprised that food was not offered for free for economy passengers. In business, I was served a steak that was surprisingly good, though difficult to cut.
For drink, I had two glasses of wine with my dinner and did not see the flight attendant come by to ask if I needed anything further.
Kama Sutra
With no ability to work and no fun to be had, I mentally challenged myself to sleep. As someone who has flown Ethiopian coach long-haul, I knew I could summon my Kama Sutra skills if the moment called for it (see The Kama Sutra of Airplane Sleep: Surviving a 17 Hour Flight).
Bright Light
Despite wearing eye shades, I was awoken by a piercing bright light. It was not an ignorant ignoramus opening the window shade on a red eye (see Etiquette of Things: Put Down Your Window Shade). This was much worse. It was my neighbor who decided that his personal light was not enough. He turned mine on as well. I turned it off, which was met with shock. He said he was trying to write. To which I said, I too will be writing, and it will be a post about you (see The Etiquette of Things: The Overhead Light).
30 Minutes
Torn away from my unsatisfying sleep, I checked the IFE app on my iPad and was delighted to see there were only 30 minutes till landing. My Kama Sutra technique had worked better than expected.
Overall
I have to fly this hell route back to MDE in December. I am not looking forward to it. But for 30k ANA points, I cannot rationalize changing it.
I have flown Avianca business class, and I like it, especially for the price.
Very insightful comment
Of course, it’s not a proper long-haul business class. But I really like how the seat cushion widens out, location of power ports, and table in the middle. Much prefer this to “Domestic First”
It’s too long a flight. It’s inhumane. Power port for what? Maybe if there’s Wi-Fi.
Hi,
Fascinating review of what sounds like a truly unique and challenging flight experience. You’ve perfectly captured the complex reality of a “budget” long-haul business class product—where the price is right, but the operational inconsistencies can test even the most seasoned traveler’s patience. Your balanced take, acknowledging the decent hard product while detailing the service and catering failures, is incredibly helpful for setting expectations.
Given your experience, does flying Avianca on a route like this feel like a calculated risk worth taking for the significant cost savings, or did the cumulative issues (from the lounge to the meal service) ultimately make it a “false economy” where paying more for a competitor like LATAM or Aerolíneas Argentinas would have been a wiser investment in comfort and reliability?
First paragraph sounds AI generated. Can’t tell if a human wrote it. Paying is never the answer. Only choice would be to backtrack to the US then fly AA to EZE. Lie flat but terrible AA service. South America isn’t on the list to return because of the lack of great points flights from PR.