You sip your champagne and eat your omelette while savoring the freshly squeezed orange juice. Out of the corner of your eye, you notice someone staring right at you. Emboldened by your first class golden ticket, you make eye contact with the inquisitive stranger. He refocuses his attention back on his printed edition of the Wall Street Journal.
Welcome to the Emirates First Class lounge at JFK or any elite level lounge anywhere in the world. I love lounges for many reasons: escaping the noise and chaos of the terminal, binging on the free champagne, and the false sense of entitlement because I am, for a few hours, VIP.
Obviously, my past antics (see here and here) prove otherwise. Furthermore, redeeming a points ticket for $2.50 instead of paying $14,000 to fly Emirates Shower Class on an A380 only bolsters the stranger’s assumption that I don’t belong here.
Like the stranger, I try to profile guests of the airport lounge trying to figure out who’s here on points and who’s here on privilege. I glance at shoes, watches, suits, and briefcases. Surely, those are indicators of professionals who are waiting to catch their flight to attend an important business conference. But wait, who is this guy wearing pajamas, sporting a Rolex, and in flip flops? Is he another points guru with a false watch trying to carry on the charade of being successful?
Wait, that’s just my reflection in the spotless mirror.
I left my house (not my house anymore!) at 430am on the way to Phoenix Sky Harbor Airport. I arrived there to find the airline lounge closed, so my requisite need for a Bloody Mary before I fly would not be fulfilled.
From there, I had to go through security again to get to the Southwest terminal, to find my gate had been changed. Then I landed in Houston and as you saw was delayed over and over followed by a gate change. I arrive in Newark to find the cost efficient AirTrain is out of service so I’m taking the bus to Penn Station then onto Grand Central to get to my friends house.I’m not a believer in exisstential forces interfering with my plans but come on already!
All these delays made me overlook how selfish I was being as I hastily exited Newark airport and the state of New jersey as a whole. Maybe this was her way of telling me to slow down. Or maybe this was Chris Christie’s doing.
It’s easy to blog when you are at home, on your not so trusty Lenovo, and have an unreliable Wi-Fi. But when you are writing a travel blog, you can’t just wait till you get home to put together the standard hotel review, the typical pics of an airline lounge (I honestly love those), and the picturesque snapshot of the beach. At the same time, it is hard to write anything thought provoking when your priority is vacation! So to compromise with my faithful following,
I have set up the a-live section where I will post daily, if not more often, quicky quick updates of where I am and what I’m up to. That way you know that Alex is “a-live” and well. It’s better than a Tweet that gets lost in the river of Twitter uselessness and judging by my Facebook likes, I am not reaching enough of my target audience. Oh and I’m trying out my new, lovely BlackBerry Q10 so that should maintain some semblance of quality as the prof writes his best angry emails on this trusty device. Ironically, so does Mitt Romney. So let’s see how this goes! Now to deal with inserting pics and the never-ending hourglass. Lucky for me I’m delayed in Houston en route to New York. What’s that Tripit? Another delay? I guess that means more posts are coming or more beer at HOU airport that doesn’t even have a lounge!
Hit the Road Jack.
Words made famous by Ray Charles and made infamous by the Cadillac dealership in Phoenix, Arizona today. (Please picket the dealership of Coulter Cadillac on Camelback if you are in the Phoenix area.)
I know I’ve been shifting the focus from traveling to moving back to traveling but unless you are moving down the street, the act of one is intertwined with the act of the other. It is not secret that I have been having a fire sale, and have finally found my BBQ a new home.
The feedback from that Craigslist ad has been remarkable, not because everyone coveted the Weber Genesis Silver but because of the outpouring of support for my struggle against the HOA and for the hilarity of the post itself.
Here is an email I received: My Dear Soul,The communist must be in control of your HOA. It is so un American to ban the God given rights of a Griller unless you are in say a gas refinery or maybe a fireworks distributor. I feel Mel is an evil person in disguise of a protector. I recently lost a dear dear friend of my and know the pain you are suffering. My poor Charbroil grill lost its life in a fiery death. I would be proud to shelter your Genesis from the likes of MEL and his communist supporter. Please contact me as soon as you can to protect the safe survival of the Flame of light ,smoke from meat and that beautiful scent that every fellow griller knows as Heaven.My condolence for your lost.Fellow Griller unite !!!P.S. please give me Mel’s address so I can dispose of the burnt shell of my Charbriol!!And this one: I think over the years I have visited craigslist I have never been moved by any listing as much as yours. I thank you for making my day better and was going to offer visitation right to you over July 4th. You are a true item in this world and please do not let Mel or anyone like him diminish your spirit!!!!! I know their must be a fiery flame in your heart.
This is why I blog!
Anyhow, the last piece of business before leaving was to find someone to take over the lease for my car. I posted an ad on LeaseTrader and am basically giving the car away for free. Buyer after buyer has shown interest in taking over the lease and today I was supposed to start the process to get rid of this beautiful liability. For some inexplicable reason, Ally Financial won’t help Arizona customers transfer their lease leaving their own customers at the mercy of the dealership for assistance. Over the last two weeks, I have been communicating with the dealership and they assured me that they would help.
Ain’t she a beauty?
Then today I received a call from the manager who said, “This has taken too many hours of our time. We are not helping you.”
Flabbergasted, I rushed over to the dealership to figure out why. Not only was I confused at their sudden change of heart but also I felt sick knowing that I still had thousands upon thousands of dollars left on my lease that I would have to honor.
I arrived at the dealership and found myself dealing with the nincompoops at Coulter who were adamant in not helping me.
The manager said, “You didn’t buy the car from us and we don’t make any money helping you with this. You are on your own with this deal. We are not helping you.”
He then asked me to wait elsewhere for the finance person and made a gesture with his hands, shooing me away. I exclaimed, “You’re dealership is empty, it’s July (it’s June but I was outraged) and there’s nobody in here, why won’t you help me!”
No apologies, no nothing, he sat their obstinate. Again, I queried, “Why won’t you help me!” and firmly said, “I’m not going anywhere.”
That’s when he asked me to leave and I said some choice words about the viability of his business (no expletives) and walked out.
I guess I won’t need a taxi to the airport.
What do I do now? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?
It was November 2011 and I was watching one of my favorite news programs (besides 60 Minutes), Nightline, when I first learned about my original mentor in the points game- The Frugal Travel Guy. He talked about traveling for free just by applying for a couple of credit cards. After watching that segment my life changed forever.
My first credit card churn (a process for racking up points described here) was reserved to one credit card, the SPG card from American Express. The spend requirement was $5000 in 3 months for 30,000 points so naturally I had to book an inaugural trip to start meeting that requirement. My first trip as a points churner was to New Orleans to see Michigan play Virginia Tech in the Sugar Bowl. I used a companion ticket, a perk from my only major points earning credit card, the Delta SkyMiles Platinum Card from American Express.
My how times have changed. I no longer fly Delta and I cancelled that card years ago.
Fast forward to spring break and I quickly spent part of my SPG points staying at the Sheraton in Nassau, Bahamas utilizing the cash and points option, whereby I provided the points and my friend Brent provided the cash. Add in a Delta voucher with a free flight back to Vegas, and that was a grand redemption.
My how times have changed.
Bahamas in coach?
After getting my feet wet, I started to read more blogs for points redemption and studied their every post from top to bottom. Each blogger has a unique style and unique insight that made the whole process fun and understandable.
1. ThePointsGuy: “Alex, there’s some other guy doing the same thing you are doing.” I hear this from friends who only read the headline of my blog posts and only read the word points in my handle and his. That is where the similarities between me and ThePointsGuy end. ThePointsGuy is the guru of crunching the numbers of points programs, showing the most efficient ways to redeem points, and is the ultimate authority on credit card offerings.
ThePointsOfLife (see full description of “What Is The Points Of Life”) is an ideology that comes from not settling from the status quo and deferring to your own ingenuity. It is Step 1 of my rehabilitation program from cubicle to the Caymans in Part II of my book Everyone’s Advice Is Wrong . . . Including Minethat encourages readers to question if this is how they envisioned spending their everyday.
An easy way to break the cycle of monotony is to use the points you earned from following ThePointsGuy by taking a trip!
2. Millionmilesecrets: This is the primer for anyone that anyone that wants to start earning points but finds the process a bit intimidating.
A special thanks to Daraius for featuring me on his interview series and for explaining the points process so that anyone can understand.
3. One Mile At a Time: Lucky, and the whole family at Boarding Area cover every topic you want to know about ranging from travel reviews, best safety videos, and all the groundbreaking points devaluations that occur in the middle of the night.
4. Milevalue: Can I go Antartica, route through Dubai, while getting an on board massage with a stopover on the moon? If you’re looking for how to pull off a points heist, then look no further than this site.
By putting it all together and you too can plan a masterpiece like I did last December: 50,000 miles in business class, 16 stops, 5 continents all for $275.
All of that wouldn’t be possible had I tried to do it on my own. So, to the points bloggers listed here, I say thank you, and to you, the reader, I also say thank you for helping me grow my blog and support the publication of my book.
Did I mention that it should be out by early July?
Picture a city where it is sunny 296 days out of the year, it never snows, there are no hurricanes, and no earthquakes. Add in a moderate cost of living, good looking people, and great pho and you have arrived in Scottsdale. In 2005, I moved to Arizona to attend law school and as you will read in my soon to be released book (I’d say early July at the latest) Everyone’s Advice Is Wrong . . . Including Mine, I have always returned to the desert as a refuge from the unexpected curve balls of life.
Somewhere along the way refuge turned me into refugee forcing me to reanalyze why I am here in this 120 degree desert. While Arizona is a great state for the reasons I have mentioned, it is also preferred by the retirement community for the same reasons. (The elderly love pho too). This country club, complacent lifestyle is too sure-footed and would not get me moving forward with my plans for international domination. The only risks that come with living in Arizona are not going to the gym everyday so you can’t be at your best at the W pool party where only the finest douches spend their Saturday afternoons.
The state is so cut off from international commerce that the only flights out of here take you to another hip destination, Cabo San Lucas, where you can encounter even more douches at the pool-their origins being from Los Angeles and Orange County.
Don’t get me wrong, I’ve had a great time in my many years as a citizen in this encampment known as Scottsdale but am ready to move on to a place where the beer flows like wine. Where beautiful women instinctively flock likethe salmon of Capistrano.
That place is the polar opposite of Arizona and is better known as Mongolia.
But, before I get there, I have a few more pointsaffairs to settle, a book to publish, and a promotionplan to reveal.
The World Cup starts tomorrow in Brazil and the paint on the stadiums is unlikely to be dry. At least, that’s is what we are being told. Whether it be the Olympics or the World Cup, questions always arise as to whether a country is ready to host the games. Four years ago in South Africa the world questioned if the tournament would be a success.
The result was a memorable World Cup and we barely heard anything about unfinished stadiums, lack of security, or any other negative media attention meant to undermine the host country.
This time, there are serious doubts about the preparedness of Brazil that are not unjustified. There have been multiple deaths in the construction of stadiums that may or may not be ready for play according to FIFA. Meanwhile, in the streets there has been social unrest due to the outlandish spending on football stadiums while the country’s infrastructure is in shambles.
In CNN Money, there is an article analyzing the expected economic impact of South Africa hosting the World Cup and the resulting reality: millions upon millions spent with a feeble spike in the economy. The question is whether the externalities of hosting such games including country pride and promotion of tourism are worth the cost of forgoing investments in public works projects that arguably are more impactful than the few weeks of euphoria while hosting an international tournament. This naturally elicits the next question: should emerging economies be granted these games with many examples of venues from Olympics past that have now been abandoned?
Last New Years, I visited South Africa making the usual circuit from the Western Cape through Cape Town, Knysna, to Port Elizabeth, to Durban, then onto Johannesburg. In Cape Town, there is a beautiful stadium that hosted the World Cup semi finals. Today, apart from some sporting matches and concerts, the stadium sits idle, apart from gracing the adjoining golf course.
Upon arriving in Durban, I asked the taxi driver about the immaculate stadium that is right in the heart of the city. He told me that unlike the other stadiums in South Africa, this one was actually making money. I was laughing when he told me how.
This June and July the futbol elites are back at it again, ready to battle for my favorite trophy in all of sports, the FIFA World Cup Trophy. For the next two months, the world will be focused on Brazil, anxiously waiting to see if the tournaments goes off without a hitch.
I, on the other hand, am more curious as to what amusement ride will be placed in the Arena Amazonia, a stadium built right in the heart of the jungle.
Is Hawaii a country? How about Aruba? How about Taiwan? Puerto Rico anyone?
The answer should be followed by the question, “Why do you ask?” which leads to the answer because I want to spite all my friends on my country count list competition.
While bloggers are asked how many Twitter followers they have, weightlifters their bench, travelers are asked their country count.
You’re not a human if you don’t have a gazillion followers on social media, not a lifter if you can’t bench 225, and not a world traveler if you aren’t part of the exclusive Travelers’ Century Club (TCC). Per their website, “The Travelers’ Century Club is a nonprofit social organization representing world travelers who have visited 100 or more of the world’s countries and territories.”
I’ll spare you the suspense and say that I have not been to 100 or more countries and territories but my goal is not to travel to every country in the world because looking at the globe, there are a few places I’m not interested in visiting today or tomorrow. At the same time, I do want to be part of the club.
Which brings us back to the title of the post, “Is Hawaii a Country?” The TCC states that there are 324 countries and territories and Hawaii is one of them. This makes many people irate for obvious reasons. But, that is because they do not understand and appreciate the points of having such an expansive list in the first place. The TCC promotes global exploration and recognizes the difficulty of reaching far off islands, archipelagos, and remote peninsulas. For a place to be included on the TCC list it must be, per the TCC’s terms, “removed from the parent country, either geographically, politically or ethnologically.” From that viewpoint, it makes sense to me to consider Alaska (as they do) a country.
From there, things get trickier as what counts as a visit to check it off your list becomes a point of contention. Is transiting through the airport enough if you have a great visa story to tell? The TCC says, “After consideration as to how long one must have stayed in a country or territory to qualify, it was decided that even the shortest visit would suffice — even if only a port-of-call, or a plane fuel stop.” If that’s the case, then I can add Khartoum, Sudan to my list.
This leads us to why any of this matters in the first place; my spite competition with my friends. Initially, I had to inflate my numbers by including Ibiza (separate from Spain per the TCC), Puerto Rico (technically part but not part of the US), and Turkey in Asia (Turkey in Europe is separate) on my list. Naturally, I included Alaska and Hawaii as well.
As I have traveled more and more, I have not erased these countries from my list but have decided to create my own own list while keeping track of formal lists as well.
1. TCC List: I have stolen a page out of my friend’s website, Lee Abbamonte, who will be the youngest person to complete the TCC’s list by creating a permanent page of my country count, where you can track my progress. Again, I will probably never complete this list as I have no idea what or who Wallis & Futuna Islands are and don’t believe that Trans Dniester is a real place.
TCC Tally: 712. The United Nations’ List
Thank no one for the United Nations, an inept international body that does nothing but create traffic jams in New York and give crazy kooks an opportunity to showcase their out of touch beliefs to a group equally disconnected to know what’s going on in the world, much less how to fix it. But, they do have a straightforward list of 193 member states. Besides the 193, the UN recognizes two non-member permanent observer states, the Holy See (the Vatican) and Palestine.
The list seems reasonable with the exception that Special Administrative Regions of the People’s Republic of China that include Hong Kong and Taiwan are not considered member states. Hong Kong has its own currency, its own language, and its own history that is clear and distinct from mainland China so it is baffling as a traveler to not include it as a separate country.
Then there’s the whole situation with Taiwan that has its own military, surely the people of Taiwan consider themselves an autonomous country!
UN Tally: 573. ThePointsOfLife List
I can’t justify fuel stops regardless of visa headaches as visiting a country. For me, it goes against the reason why I travel in the first place- exploration. Sorry, Sudan, you are out of my list. Furthermore, because I am American I can’t say that Hawaii and Alaska should be included because my same crappy Sprint service still works there.
But, I will say that Puerto Rico and the US Virgin Islands should count because they do not have representatives that vote in Congress. Also, I do count Aruba even if it is Dutch because once colonized islands have substantial independence from the Queen. For that reason, I add in Bermuda and St. Maarten as well.
ThePointsOfLife Tally: 66Conclusion
I have 520 Twitter followers, can do 3*10 @225, and have been to 57, strike that, 66, maybe 71 countries and I want more.
Note: This was written on June 8, 2014. Here is the latest tally of all the places I’ve visited.
The words of an inquiring man, also known as Brent Dutcher, for whom I have dedicated my book, Everyone’s Advice Is Wrong . . . Including Mine. Two years ago, Mr. Dutcher told me to read a self-help book and sent me the title. Upon review of the nonsense that he sent, I replied, “That book is stupid. I can write you a better one myself.” And the rest is history. Anyhow, this post is much more than a preview for my book that should be released by the end of the month if everything goes as planned. It is meant to address Brent’s valid observation that the angry professor seems to complain a lot when he is not treated like royalty at a hotel or given the red carpet treatment by an airline. In all fairness to myself, this comes from the guy that spams all his friends with emails about how much he hates living in Lake Angelus. [no sic needed, I meant Angelus not Angeles] To begin, I ask you, the audience, what kind of service should do you expect from 5 Star accommodations and do you believe that these expectations should be tempered because you are paying next to nothing to enjoy them.
Jumeirah Hotels: Accept No Substitutes
My expectations have been satirized in the post “VIP No More, I Headed Back Home Outraged” but the reason for his question is because I do email every hotel and every airline if the service is not up to standard. The way I see it, paying customer or points customer, the hotel and airline is still benefitting from the externalities of my stay, whether they be extra fees, overpriced hamburgers, or the joy of seeing my face in the lobby. In exchange if the hotel or airline holds itself out to be customer focused, then they should genuinely strive to make their customers welcome. Anything short of that and you better believe they are receiving a strongly worded letter from yours truly. So I ask you, the reader, am I complaining or correcting?
cuz im happy…
You sip your champagne and eat your omelette while savoring the freshly squeezed orange juice. Out of the corner of your eye, you notice someone staring right at you. Emboldened by your first class golden ticket, you make eye contact with the inquisitive stranger. He refocuses his attention back on his printed edition of the Wall Street Journal.
Welcome to the Emirates First Class lounge at JFK or any elite level lounge anywhere in the world. I love lounges for many reasons: escaping the noise and chaos of the terminal, binging on the free champagne, and the false sense of entitlement because I am, for a few hours, VIP.
Obviously, my past antics (see here and here) prove otherwise. Furthermore, redeeming a points ticket for $2.50 instead of paying $14,000 to fly Emirates Shower Class on an A380 only bolsters the stranger’s assumption that I don’t belong here.
Like the stranger, I try to profile guests of the airport lounge trying to figure out who’s here on points and who’s here on privilege. I glance at shoes, watches, suits, and briefcases. Surely, those are indicators of professionals who are waiting to catch their flight to attend an important business conference. But wait, who is this guy wearing pajamas, sporting a Rolex, and in flip flops? Is he another points guru with a false watch trying to carry on the charade of being successful?
Wait, that’s just my reflection in the spotless mirror.
It’s easy to blog when you are at home, on your not so trusty Lenovo, and have an unreliable Wi-Fi. But when you are writing a travel blog, you can’t just wait till you get home to put together the standard hotel review, the typical pics of an airline lounge (I honestly love those), and the picturesque snapshot of the beach. At the same time, it is hard to write anything thought provoking when your priority is vacation! So to compromise with my faithful following,
I have set up the a-live section where I will post daily, if not more often, quicky quick updates of where I am and what I’m up to. That way you know that Alex is “a-live” and well. It’s better than a Tweet that gets lost in the river of Twitter uselessness and judging by my Facebook likes, I am not reaching enough of my target audience. Oh and I’m trying out my new, lovely BlackBerry Q10 so that should maintain some semblance of quality as the prof writes his best angry emails on this trusty device. Ironically, so does Mitt Romney. So let’s see how this goes! Now to deal with inserting pics and the never-ending hourglass. Lucky for me I’m delayed in Houston en route to New York. What’s that Tripit? Another delay? I guess that means more posts are coming or more beer at HOU airport that doesn’t even have a lounge!
My how times have changed. I no longer fly Delta and I cancelled that card years ago.
Fast forward to spring break and I quickly spent part of my SPG points staying at the Sheraton in Nassau, Bahamas utilizing the cash and points option, whereby I provided the points and my friend Brent provided the cash. Add in a Delta voucher with a free flight back to Vegas, and that was a grand redemption.
My how times have changed.
Bahamas in coach?
After getting my feet wet, I started to read more blogs for points redemption and studied their every post from top to bottom. Each blogger has a unique style and unique insight that made the whole process fun and understandable.
1. ThePointsGuy: “Alex, there’s some other guy doing the same thing you are doing.” I hear this from friends who only read the headline of my blog posts and only read the word points in my handle and his. That is where the similarities between me and ThePointsGuy end. ThePointsGuy is the guru of crunching the numbers of points programs, showing the most efficient ways to redeem points, and is the ultimate authority on credit card offerings.
ThePointsOfLife (see full description of “What Is The Points Of Life”) is an ideology that comes from not settling from the status quo and deferring to your own ingenuity. It is Step 1 of my rehabilitation program from cubicle to the Caymans in Part II of my book Everyone’s Advice Is Wrong . . . Including Mine that encourages readers to question if this is how they envisioned spending their everyday.
An easy way to break the cycle of monotony is to use the points you earned from following ThePointsGuy by taking a trip!
2. Millionmilesecrets: This is the primer for anyone that anyone that wants to start earning points but finds the process a bit intimidating.
A special thanks to Daraius for featuring me on his interview series and for explaining the points process so that anyone can understand.
3. One Mile At a Time: Lucky, and the whole family at Boarding Area cover every topic you want to know about ranging from travel reviews, best safety videos, and all the groundbreaking points devaluations that occur in the middle of the night.
4. Milevalue: Can I go Antartica, route through Dubai, while getting an on board massage with a stopover on the moon? If you’re looking for how to pull off a points heist, then look no further than this site.
By putting it all together and you too can plan a masterpiece like I did last December: 50,000 miles in business class, 16 stops, 5 continents all for $275.
All of that wouldn’t be possible had I tried to do it on my own. So, to the points bloggers listed here, I say thank you, and to you, the reader, I also say thank you for helping me grow my blog and support the publication of my book.
Did I mention that it should be out by early July?
Somewhere along the way refuge turned me into refugee forcing me to reanalyze why I am here in this 120 degree desert. While Arizona is a great state for the reasons I have mentioned, it is also preferred by the retirement community for the same reasons. (The elderly love pho too). This country club, complacent lifestyle is too sure-footed and would not get me moving forward with my plans for international domination. The only risks that come with living in Arizona are not going to the gym everyday so you can’t be at your best at the W pool party where only the finest douches spend their Saturday afternoons.
The state is so cut off from international commerce that the only flights out of here take you to another hip destination, Cabo San Lucas, where you can encounter even more douches at the pool-their origins being from Los Angeles and Orange County.
Don’t get me wrong, I’ve had a great time in my many years as a citizen in this encampment known as Scottsdale but am ready to move on to a place where the beer flows like wine. Where beautiful women instinctively flock likethe salmon of Capistrano.
That place is the polar opposite of Arizona and is better known as Mongolia.
But, before I get there, I have a few more points affairs to settle, a book to publish, and a promotion plan to reveal.
Upon arriving in Durban, I asked the taxi driver about the immaculate stadium that is right in the heart of the city. He told me that unlike the other stadiums in South Africa, this one was actually making money. I was laughing when he told me how.
This June and July the futbol elites are back at it again, ready to battle for my favorite trophy in all of sports, the FIFA World Cup Trophy. For the next two months, the world will be focused on Brazil, anxiously waiting to see if the tournaments goes off without a hitch.
I, on the other hand, am more curious as to what amusement ride will be placed in the Arena Amazonia, a stadium built right in the heart of the jungle.
