Keep Your Hands to Yourself is part of the Gold Medal Trip Report.
By now you should be familiar with my next book, The Etiquette of Things. Things You Didn’t Know Were Things. Here’s another installment. It comes from the Grand Hyatt Barcelona happy hour, a perk for those with club lounge access.
Despite my complaints about the Grand Hyatt BCN, I did enjoy the happy hour. Who can complain about bottomless cava and tapas? This story has nothing to do with the Hyatt and everything to do with a guest of the Hyatt.
While loading my plate with all the goodies, I stopped to take this photo.
What a cool container of potato chips I thought. I used the tongs to take a few chips. I put the tongs down, and almost immediately a man dipped his entire hand into the jar and loaded his plate with chips. He did it directly in front of me with no shame.
I was revolted but decided not to confront this gross individual. Instead, I went back to my table and ate the other tapas. On his way out, the man walked by the chips again, dipped his hand in again, and left with a handful.
I hope somehow he comes across this book and learns the lesson: keep your dirty hands to yourself!
Grand Hyatt Barcelona Hotel Review is part of the Gold Medal Trip Report.
There are hotels that I expect will disappoint. There are also hotels that I expect to exceed expectations. Grand Hyatt BCN was one of those that I expected to be great. In the end, there was good, there was bad, and there was annoying.Good: Room
Great king-size bed, good shower.
I love when the controls are next to the bed.Bad: Elevator Room
I hate rooms next to the elevator. Worse than the elevator was being next to the service entrance. All morning it sounded like someone was coming into my room. I would hear dishes and glasses tossed around and people talking. It was impossible to sleep.
Annoying: Coffee
I found it funny that they gave 4 decaf to 2 normal espressos (see Why So Much Decaf?). Extra water was welcomeGood: Happy Hour
Who doesn’t love a great happy hour? Excellent Cava and a diversity of snacks were offered during the two days I went to the bar on the ground floor. My personal favorite is the tortilla de patata.
Bad: Lounge
This was one boring lounge with no atmosphere. It didn’t even have music. It did have plenty of normal coffee.
Annoying: Location
While the location of this hotel was not as remote as the Hyatt Regency Barcelona Tower, which was in the middle of nowhere, the Grand Hyatt Barcelona is not in the heart of the city. I wasted too much money on taxis instead of being able to walk out my door. Good: Spa
The spa was incredible. After my experience in Colombia (see Frozen: Ice Bath Medellin), I easily handled the cold pool and spent the rest of the time dipping here and dipping there.Bad: Pool
I am exaggerating when I say the pool was bad, but I need to keep the theme going. It was adequate. Annoying: People
People who put their hands in the chip jar (see Etiquette of Things: Keep Your Dirty Hands to Yourself). Overall
The hotel was good, bad, and annoying. The only reason I would not stay here again is because of the location.
Why So Much Decaf? is part of the Gold Medal Trip Report.
I complain about everything (see Have You Ever Not Complained?). And I don’t apologize for it. I had legitimate complaints while staying at the Grand Hyatt BCN (see Grant Hyatt Barcelona: Good, Bad, & Annoying). I also had one that was just for laughs.
Nespresso
Let it be known to all, that the best pod espresso machine is Nespresso. The rest fall short. I will settle for an impostor machine over instant coffee. It is a devastating disappointment to check into a hotel and discover no espresso machine. Typically this happens in the US.
At the Grand Hyatt Barcelona, there was not a Nespresso machine but something that looked like it. Ready to attack the town (see Guns & Butter: Barcelona Travel Guide), I proceeded to make myself an espresso. To my amazement, I discovered 4 decaf pods and 2 normal. At home, I have decaf pods for the rare occasion when I want that espresso taste without the espresso bolt. It makes sense that hotels provide the decaf option, though I have to wonder how many people use it. What does not make sense is the ratio of 4 decafs to 2.
I could have let it go, but I decided to ask the front desk. Ever the smart ass, I showed the man the picture and asked him what he saw. He said cream and espresso. Like Rafiki, I told him to look closer. He said, “Ah ha! There are 4 decafs and 2 normal.” I queried in Spanish if in a city like Barcelona if this made sense. Unlike my last joke in Spanish that almost got me removed from an airplane (see Iberia Business ORD-MAD: Mask Jokes Literally Don’t Fly), he laughed and said no. He then sent someone to my room with enough espresso for Rick James and me.
Creeper Cam is part of the Gold Medal Trip Report.
There was a time in my life that I walked around with a video camera. It was known as the creeper cam by virtue of its ability to capture stealth moments in HD. In total I had 3 of these Sanyo-made devices. As phones took over, the desire to carry an extra device faded as did my creepiness. Incidentally, this was around the same time I started my blog in 2014 (see TPOL Is Ten And #MasterOfWon).
Although TPOL loves writing about travel, there’s more to Alexander Bachuwa than points. Accordingly, I have started a YouTube channel appropriately named Master of Won. This is not an amateur operation. I have a film producer who takes my content and produces magic that should generate fractions of hundreds of pennies (see TPOL’s Way Out of Poverty Is Not Vlogging).
The inaugural clip is coming soon. For now, answer this question: do you find this guy creepy?
Direct Bus from Andorra is part of the Gold Medal Trip Report.
I booked a roundtrip journey with Direct Bus from Barcelona to Andorra. Because I ‘missed’ the bus from Barcelona to Andorra (see I Missed My Ride: Not So ‘Direct Bus’ Andorra), I made sure to get to the bus station early and to ask what time and exactly where the bus would come.
The monitor in the bus terminal pointed to where the bus would be. I took no chances and sat right under it.
Not my busNot my bus
When the bus that said DirectBus arrived, I attempted to board it. The driver said that my electronic ticket was no good and that I needed to go into the office and obtain a paper ticket. Anxiety set in as I became worried that as soon as I turned my back, the bus would poof! Disappear.
My bus
Luckily, that didn’t happen. The journey was smooth minus the cursory inspection at the Spanish border.
TPOL’s TIP: DirectBus picks up from BCN airport but drops off at the main train station.
Andorra Travel Guide is part of the Gold Medal Trip Report.
TPOL’s Guns & Butter Travel Guide is the best way to see as much as you can in as little time as possible. Here’s how it works: A trip is composed of two factors: Labor And Lazy. The opportunity cost (what is given up) for relaxing and being Lazy is gained by being adventurous in the form of Labor and vice versa. The guide includes inefficient activities i.e., tourist traps that should be avoided and aspirational activities that are worth doing but may be impossible to see given the constraints of time and resources.Getting There: A bus costs 60 euros to and from Andorra but make sure you don’t miss it (see I Missed My Ride: Not So ‘Direct Bus’ Andorra & Andbus to Andorra: ‘And’ It Showed Up).
Return to this bus station.
Why do people come to Andorra? Most come to the home of the Pyrenesse to ski. TPOL doesn’t ski. Some come to hike. This was a day trip and TPOL had no interest in physical exertion. Others come for the Country Count novelty. This applied to me (see Where I’ve Been).
Tax-Free Shopping
One interesting fact about Andorra is that it is a tax-free zone. While that is true, I did not find the prices to be especially competitive for my interests (see TPOL Knows Cologne, Just Don’t Buy It on a Plane )
Versace is the best.Why are golf balls so expensive everywhere?TPOL’s Tip: There is a 9-hole golf course in Andorra.
The prices were great for alcohol. Not sure about the prices but the sign was clever.Nobility of Time
The point of interest that fascinated me was Dali’s Noblesse du temps or nobility of time. As a sophomore at the University of Michigan, I had the Persistence of Memory poster hung on my wall.Old Town
Although I did not go hiking, I spent hours walking through the city. It certainly has the old town charm (see Astray in Old Town: Great Places to Get Lost).
Satisfied with my cultural experience, I stopped at Barri Antic for a beer.
From there, it was on to the old parliament. When I learned of the cover charge, I declined to enter.
The next objective was to take photos of the curious gold men sitting down. Since returning I have researched said men. They are called the 7 Poets and were created by Jaume Plensa. Regarding the moments, Plensa said, “Poets are a key part of society. They are doomed to failure because they know they won’t sell even three books, but they are a source of fertility, like a very fine rain that penetrates the earth.” He might as well be talking about TPOL.TPOL’s Tip: Buy Everyone’s Advice Is Wrong . . . Including Mine.
Before making my way to the bus station promptly, I went for another beer and a bowl of gazpacho, a must on a terribly hot day.
Overall
Am I the cultural attaché to Andorra? Hardly. Is it worth going? Of course.
Andbus to Andorra is part of the Gold Medal Trip Report.
I still needed to get to Andorra after the first bus did not show up (see I Missed My Ride: Not So ‘Direct Bus’ Andorra). To do so, I had to take another bus to Terminal 1, which confirmed that I was indeed in the right place when I was waiting for Direct Bus. What is nice about Andbus is how the website shows clearly where the bus stop is.
No confusion here.Terminal 1Look who it isWhere I waitLook who arrivedOn my way
After boarding the bus, the driver made his way through the airport. I, once again, passed Terminal 2. And I, once again, wondered how it was possible that my bus did not come.
Hello Terminal 2
I spent the next three hours blogging and beginning my quest to be a YouTube sensation (see Creeper Cam Is Back: Alexander Bachuwa Launches the Vlog).
The gearThe Vlog
When we arrived in Andorra, there was no passport check. We rolled right through.
Welcome to Andorra
Not So ‘Direct Bus’ Andorra is part of the Gold Medal Trip Report.
I have been forever paranoid about missing a flight (see Boarding Announcement Paranoia). I am terrified of being caught on a train without a ticket (see “Tickets, Please, Tickets”: Train Anxiety). And I am scared that I will take the wrong bus or, worse still, miss the bus completely.
To prevent Travel Lesson posts from accumulating, I purposefully and strategically researched the bus from Barcelona to Andorra. I came across Direct Bus. For 60 euros, I could easily and without hassle reach another country on my list (see Where I’ve Been).
I took note that the bus picks up at Terminal 2 and scheduled my Bolt to make sure I arrived with plenty of time to spare. Upon arrival, I went to the information desk to double-check the location of the bus stop. She confirmed that it was out the doors to the right.
Unfortunately, there were no signs that said Direct Bus. As the minutes ticked along, I became concerned. Not wanting to be idle, I asked multiple bus drivers. Both said I was in the right spot.
Is this the right spot?Right spot, wrong bus
With the pickup time moments away, I made use of the Direct Bus WhatsApp contact. Here’s what I was told.
Assured that I was in the right place and that the bus was there, I waited past the pick-up time and assumed that maybe the bus was running late.
A few minutes later, a Direct Bus arrived. I thought this was it. When I went to board, the driver said that he was not going to Andorra and that my bus had already left. I tried to explain that I had been here the entire time but he said ‘se fue’ and that was the end.
Right bus, wrong bus.
Outraged, I called Direct Bus and the agent tried to convince me that I missed the bus and that I would have to wait two hours for another one.
I could have gone home but decided to book with another company, Andbus, hoping it would show up.
Confirmed: I was in Terminal 2Transport to Terminal 1Going to Terminal 1 to catch AndbusOverall
There is no Travel Lesson to be learned. The bus did not show up. I am not crazy.
My first stop on this crazy trip was Barcelona. Typically, I land at a destination and the craziness starts. This time, I took a different approach. This time I decided to ease my way into the trip. The Hyatt BCN is the perfect place to implement this strategy. Why?
1. It is very close to the airport.
Had I not messed with Uber and Bolt, I could have been in my comfy Hyatt bed in minutes.
2. It is in the middle of nowhere.
I don’t appreciate that this place is called the Hyatt Regency Barcelona. While technically it is in Barcelona, there’s nothing that resembles Barcelona for kilometers. If I had hurriedly booked this hotel with the expectation that I would be somewhere in the vicinity, I would have been quite disappointed. Fortunately, I have learned the lesson that Hotel Name + City Name does not equal prime real estate (see Four Points Ljubljana: Not Near the Centre). This time the less-than-ideal location was to my advantage. The goal was not to do anything. Temptation was far from my door making this mission easy to accomplish.
Fun is not right outside your door.3. Points Cheap
What will we do when Hyatt has a serious devaluation like Hilton? This would end my ability to pad stays at properties without worrying about points (see Bus-Ted: Gold Medal Trip Report Points & Cash Summary). For 9k a night, I received a great room and a hot shower.Where’s TPOL?Where’s TPOL?4. Close to Andorra
As stated above, the Hyatt is close to the airport. The airport is where I attempted to catch the bus to Andorra. This is convenient if logistics go as planned (see I Missed My Ride: Not So ‘Direct Bus’ Andorra).
5. It’s a Funky HotelNo espresso machine is bad.But olives in the mini bar? Good.Overall
If you’re looking to ease your way into your Euro trip, stay at the Hyatt Regency Barcelona.
Olives I would pay for.
What a cool container of potato chips I thought. I used the tongs to take a few chips. I put the tongs down, and almost immediately a man dipped his entire hand into the jar and loaded his plate with chips. He did it directly in front of me with no shame.
I was revolted but decided not to confront this gross individual. Instead, I went back to my table and ate the other tapas. On his way out, the man walked by the chips again, dipped his hand in again, and left with a handful.
I hope somehow he comes across this book and learns the lesson: keep your dirty hands to yourself! 
Good: Room
Great king-size bed, good shower.
Bad: Elevator Room
I hate rooms next to the elevator. Worse than the elevator was being next to the service entrance. All morning it sounded like someone was coming into my room. I would hear dishes and glasses tossed around and people talking. It was impossible to sleep.
Annoying: Coffee
I found it funny that they gave 4 decaf to 2 normal espressos (see Why So Much Decaf?). 
Bad: Lounge
This was one boring lounge with no atmosphere. It didn’t even have music. It did have plenty of normal coffee.
Annoying: Location
While the location of this hotel was not as remote as the Hyatt Regency Barcelona Tower, which was in the middle of nowhere, the Grand Hyatt Barcelona is not in the heart of the city. I wasted too much money on taxis instead of being able to walk out my door. 
Good: Spa
The spa was incredible. After my experience in Colombia (see Frozen: Ice Bath Medellin), I easily handled the cold pool and spent the rest of the time dipping here and dipping there.
Bad: Pool
I am exaggerating when I say the pool was bad, but I need to keep the theme going. It was adequate. 
Annoying: People
People who put their hands in the chip jar (see Etiquette of Things: Keep Your Dirty Hands to Yourself). 
Overall
The hotel was good, bad, and annoying. The only reason I would not stay here again is because of the location. 
Tax-Free Shopping
One interesting fact about Andorra is that it is a tax-free zone. While that is true, I did not find the prices to be especially competitive for my interests (see TPOL Knows Cologne, Just Don’t Buy It on a Plane )
Old Town
Although I did not go hiking, I spent hours walking through the city. It certainly has the old town charm (see Astray in Old Town: Great Places to Get Lost). 
Satisfied with my cultural experience, I stopped at Barri Antic for a beer.
From there, it was on to the old parliament. When I learned of the cover charge, I declined to enter. 
The next objective was to take photos of the curious gold men sitting down. Since returning I have researched said men. They are called the 7 Poets and were created by Jaume Plensa. Regarding the moments, Plensa said, “Poets are a key part of society. They are doomed to failure because they know they won’t sell even three books, but they are a source of fertility, like a very fine rain that penetrates the earth.” He might as well be talking about TPOL.
TPOL’s Tip: Buy Everyone’s Advice Is Wrong . . . Including Mine.
Before making my way to the bus station promptly, I went for another beer and a bowl of gazpacho, a must on a terribly hot day.
Overall
Am I the cultural attaché to Andorra? Hardly. Is it worth going? Of course. 
Assured that I was in the right place and that the bus was there, I waited past the pick-up time and assumed that maybe the bus was running late.
A few minutes later, a Direct Bus arrived. I thought this was it. When I went to board, the driver said that he was not going to Andorra and that my bus had already left. I tried to explain that I had been here the entire time but he said ‘se fue’ and that was the end.
4. Close to Andorra
As stated above, the Hyatt is close to the airport. The airport is where I attempted to catch the bus to Andorra. This is convenient if logistics go as planned (see I Missed My Ride: Not So ‘Direct Bus’ Andorra).
5. It’s a Funky Hotel
