Rimowa Luggage: Maybe If I’m Flying Private

I wrote a post about how Delta carelessly broke my luggage (see Delta Damaged Bag Premium Economy Flight Review) and how they remedied it by paying me $300 (see $300 Delta Damaged Luggage Payment: Fair?). In that post, one reader, Dan, wrote, “exactly the type of person who’d use a fake rimowa… not even remotely surprised.” I was so upset with this comment, I quit blogging (see April Fools).

I am proud to say that I know nothing about suitcases. I have been traveling with the same Osprey carry-on since 2009 and have only changed the backpack, which is also Osprey.

Real travelers do not check bags (see What to Pack: “Take 1/2 the Clothes, Twice the Money” & the revised post, What to Pack: Take 1/4 of the Clothes, 1/2 the Money). The only reason I check bags is to go on a Residency Trip (see TPOL in Madrid: Why A Second Residency?).

So when Dan said what he said, I should have taken it as a compliment. Besides the Arab favorite Mary Samsonite, I know nothing about suitcases. Like my view of visas, I regarded clunky suitcases as necessary instruments used by people like my grandma to bring over spices back from Iraq. I always assumed that half the stuff in the suitcase would be broken and the other half would be confiscated ‘randomly’ by TSA (see ‘Randomly’ Screened at Tiniest Airport & Traveling While Arab? Pack Your Sense of Humor).

As it turns out, there is a world beyond Samsonite, a world for the distinguished traveler. Leaving Vegas, I happened to stumble upon that world in the Crystals Mall next to the Aria (see Sweet Life).  Along with the typical brands of Hermes, Gucci, and Lanvin, the mall had a Rimowa store. I had to go in and see for myself what the fuss was all about.

For $5,750, you can buy a chess attaché. Unsophisticated, I had to Google ‘attaché’ to see what it meant in the context of luggage. It is short for attaché case which is “a small, flat, rectangular case used for carrying documents.” For $4,625, you can buy a poker attaché. For $2,125, if you are Lyman Zerga, you can buy ‘a briefcase for the new generation.‘ Finally, if you want to buy the Rimowa version of the suitcase I had, you can spend $1,430.

Why would anyone spend that much on a suitcase? My grandma loved her spices, but surely there are cheaper ways to ensure they are secure. I like my tennis racket which was damaged in the Delta flight, but it would be more efficient to buy a hard case for it than to spend this much on one piece of luggage. Even if I were richer than I am now, why would I put and trust such beautiful luggage in the hands of the guys with the ear muffs? Do you think they care that it is a Rimowa?

Thank you Dan for reminding me that I am Saul Bloom and not some hustled sucker. Perhaps when I rob the vault at the Bellagio, I can store my cash in a Rimowa on the way to the private terminal at Harry Reid. Until then, I am sticking with my bargain brand piece of plastic from TJ Maxx.