Paddle Bored

For most, going on vacation means relaxation, unwinding, and a momentary break from the everyday. Then you arrive and find yourself with nothing to do. While some people unplug from their emails, social media, and all other distractions, I get bored of ‘relaxing’ almost immediately. Searching for something to do both active and entertaining, I came across this ‘sport’ called paddleboarding. My friend in Miami said It was a good workout and a way to get out in the water. So I thought I would give it a shot. After falling off to a chorus of laughs once again, I decided to park my paddleboard on the shore and do nothing. Watching my friends attempt to windsurf was just as bad as my attempts to cut through the water of the Intracoastal. I’ve paddleboarded from Mauritius to the Maldives and have concluded I need a new vacation hobby. At least, the experience made for some good pictures. IMGA0163 IMGA0365 Watch out for the seaplane!            

Swamp Water

I am here in Miami Beach visiting a friend of mine who incidentally refuses to like my blog on Facebook. Anyhow, his stubborn mentality notwithstanding, I am enjoying my time in South Beach. (Well Coral Gables but that name doesn’t have the same sizzle) To watch Michigan’s predestined journey to the Final Four, we came to our favorite bar in Brickell- Brother Jimmy’s BBQ. The bartender just asked us if we are on spring break. Flattered by her feeble attempt to make me feel young, I said no and ordered the standard Jack and diet. My other friend rather inspired by her comment ordered their signature cocktail- “Swamp Water”. Swamp water comes in a goldfish tank and includes a rubber alligator that serves as garnish. The drink itself is probably 200 grams of sugar and zero alcohol but looks like a lot of fun. After sitting down, some locals asked if we were from out of town and advised my friend to dump his Swamp Water and order a real drink to save face. Obviously he didn’t nor should he have. But, this does beg the question: when do you become too old to partake in juvenile revelry? Better yet, when are you too old to go on spring break?
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No One Listens to the Professor

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When I was in school, then school, then school, then school some more (all the way to 28) kids used to listen to their teachers, students to their professors. Those days are gone now. Nobody pays attention, idiots are on Facebook, and in many cases, pupils don’t bother showing up. I remember once, as an MBA exchange student at Fudan University in Shanghai, a Chinese student went under the desk to answer his phone and engaged in a boisterous conversation. He popped back up and didn’t think twice about what he had just done. This brings me back to me- the angry old professor. For about a year I was an adjunct professor of law and liked the title so much, I require strangers and friends alike to address me by my distinguished title- Professor. Older  and angrier, I am ever more consumed with frustrations on just about everything and am never shy to voice my opinion, even if by force. Two years ago, a friend of mine told that he was reading self-help book about getting rich.I said that’s stupid, I can write you a better one. What result? The book, Everyone’s Advice Is Wrong . . . Including Mine, is now complete and ready for publication. Exciting news no doubt. But wait, how soon you forget the title of this entry: no one listens to the professor. The publication process is by far the dumbest load of nonsense ever. It takes me back to my days applying for law jobs (technically I’m an attorney) where the interviewer would ask if I would be bringing my own clients to the firm. To which I replied, “If I had clients, why would I need to work for you.” Enter publisher: Do you have a lot of twitter followers? Forget, can you spell words that make sentences that make paragraphs that make chapters that creates a book. No, “Do you have a lot of Twitter followers.” Dumbfounded, the publisher questioned why would anyone read by book since I am nobody. The angry old professor now believes only way to get published these days is to have no talent. Instead, you have to get a bajillion likes on Facebook or have a bunch of creepy people following your every move on Twitter. Talent is not relevant, tweeting is. How have we come so far, I do not know. So, to clear a path for my amazing book and message to reach the masses, I have stooped to the lowly point of blogging. I will make the same promise that every douche does when he starts a blog: this blog will not be like all the others you have read. (Yeah sure it won’t be.) Well, at least it will be somewhat different for three reasons: 1.  What blog tells you where in the world has the best Pho and how to fly for free in order to enjoy it? 2. What blog can you visit in order to read the highly anticipated book, The World Press before it comes out in stores? 3. What blog shamelessly admits to soliciting support in order to advance his own interest? This one. The real question becomes: Would you listen to this angry old professor? IMG_0454 Of course you would.  

Southwest Airlines’ Flight of the Night . . .

Presented by nobody! So I’m en route to Miami (FLL) from Phoenix on a direct flight that cost me a whopping $2.50 less a free bag of peanuts. They even gave me another for free. Today while many airlines are charging more and providing less, Southwest is doing the opposite. Reward flights are easy to attain and easier still to redeem. This post is a great segue for what is possible when u begin to Enjoy #ThePointsOfLife. In the coming posts in this category I will tell you all you need to know to get to Las Vegas or even better Los Cabos flying Southwest for next to nothing. Oh, and you can bring your companion for free!

All this can be yours if the points are right . . .

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It’s all well and good when every imbecile tells you of their great travels and then never reveals exactly how they get it done. Well, I may be many things but imbecile I am not. I am going to provide the simple tutorial over the following posts in the Points101 section that shows you how I did the following for $275, all in business class. Itinerary   Look the trip still isn’t done! Of course, #EnjoyThePointsOfLife is Part 2: Step 1 of the much anticipated, soon to be #1 NYT best-seller, Everyone’s Advice Is Wrong . . . Including Mine  

Detroit Delicious

Food. Yum. Need I say more? Travel anywhere, well mostly anywhere and you will encounter amazing food. I’m going to start with the holy grail of food, Coney Islands in the D. After a late night following a Tigers game, an inevitable Detroit Lions loss, nothing is better than chillyicheese fries, a gyros, and a Detroit style chili dog. I know people stateside and indeed worldwide are scared of Detroit and therefore let that fabricated fear get the best of them. That unwarranted fear quickly dissipates after having those tasty treats. Please support American Coney Island when you finally get to Detroit to watch a Lions victory. Here’s how our global food tour begins: a plate of food on a table Hey, at least I had a diet pepsi.

Beer me

Who doesn’t like beer? It’s simply un-American if you answer you do not. But, let’s face it, American beers aren’t exactly the greatest. While you have your micro breweries and all the hoppy [disgusting IPA’s] that everyone rants and raves about, there’s nothing like going to a foreign land and tasting that local brew. Rule number one after leaving the hotel, anywhere I am, stateside or abroad is to never pass a pub. Walk in, order, drink, enjoy. Let the vacation begin: 

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Party Time Worldwide

“I can have fun without drinking,” someone once told me. Maybe, it is possible but I prefer the alternative. What’s on your bucket list? (worst saying btw) I hope Koh Phangan, Thailand. DSC01184 Stay tuned for the debauchery, worldwide of course.

We’re Off to Wine Country Worldwide

What makes a good wine? What credibility do I have to tell you what wine is good and what wine is crap? These pressing questions and much more  will be answered in my international expedition: Alex takes on Wine Country Worldwide. So go to your local Costco, pick up your bottle of $7.99 Merlot and prepare to be wowed. As usual, we start with a picture preview: DSC02942

Pho Sho: Top 10 Pho Worldwide

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For all my Pho lovers and friends, I have traveled the world in search of that perfect bowl of pho. Pho Tai is my favorite and I will document with pictures and stories where I was wowed by a great bowl and where I was left disappointed. For those of you who do not know what pho is, shame on you. No worries, I’ll take you to pho university. Let’s start with a nice pic to set the mood:

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Keep up on twitter for when I post #10.