Disclaimer: I drafted this post in October 2021. One day, and maybe that day is today, we can look back and see how stupid these travel restrictions were.
To go to Italy from the UK, the Italian government requires a negative test taken within 48 hours of arrival. This shortened, random duration meant the test I took in Belfast (see Scam Covid Test #1: Entering the UK) would no longer be valid. For convenience, Manchester airport has a testing center on-site. Unlike entry into the UK, which required a PCR test, Italy accepted the less intrusive antigen test. After a quick swab, I was sent on my way to await the results. Like I did in Colombia (see Room Service: I’m Here with Your Covid Test), I wondered what I would do if it came back positive. How much money or points would I have to burn to quarantine? Moments later, I received confirmation that I was negative. Relieved as I might be, I continue to be annoyed at the scam that testing has become. How much money is being made off of these tests?
TPOL’s Guns & Butter Travel Guide is the best way to see as much as you can in as little time as possible. Here’s how it works – A trip is composed of two factors: Labor And Lazy. The opportunity cost (what is given up) for relaxing and being Lazy is gained by being adventurous in the form of Labor and vice versa. The guide includes inefficient activities i.e., tourist traps that should be avoided and aspirational activities that are worth doing but may be impossible to see given the constraints of time and resources.
I am convinced more than ever that the TCC list for what constitutes a country should be the standard for the ever popular question- How many countries have you visited (see Is Hawaii a Country?)? Wales is a perfect example of a place that is not a country by the standard definition, but should be for a plethora of reasons.
Here are a few:
They have their own language, Welsh. They have their own national football team. They have dragons.
TPOL’s Tip: Treat yourself to some wine as you wait for the connecting train in Chester.
Where the duck are you from ffffff Flint town
The Town
The town looks like something from a storybook.
Dragons
The stories are true. There are dragons everywhere.
Coffee
The first stop was a coffee house that looked more like my grandma’s house than a Starbucks.
Souvenirs
TPOL’s Travel Lesson for souvenirs is simple: if you see it and like it, buy it. Something always comes up if I leave such purchases to the end.
TPOL’s Tip: This does not apply for souvenirs that require bargaining.
In Conwy, I bought the staple shot glass, coasters, and a football jersey but neglected to buy a dragon futbol scarf.
Castle
A local told me he never went to the castle and he would never go. “The castle was built by the English to keep us out.” I dare someone to tell him that Wales is not a country.
The reason I went to Wales was to check off another country on my Country Count. The reason I went to Conwy is because strangers at a random bar in Edinburgh told me that Conwy has the best mussels and lamb in the world.
Probably the finest fish & chips but definitely the best mussels.
Bar
I was told to go to the Marina for mussels. That required taking a taxi. Before figuring out the logistics of how to do that, I thought it wise to stop at a bar and have a drink.
Like the coffee house, this pub was more like a friend’s house and less like a bar. Cozy in the corner, I pulled up the menu for Marina but did not see mussels. In a friendly mood, I asked the man seated on the couch next to me if he was from Conwy and if he knew where I could find mussels. Stewart, as I learned his name to be, took it upon himself to call multiple restaurants to inquire. Alas, no one had mussels. Recognizing one of the local chefs sitting at the bar, he asked if his restaurant had any mussels. The chef replied that the order had not come in but the prognosis was not promising. I messaged my Welsh friend who was dumbfounded when I said the town was dry. I then went across the street to Shakespeare’s, the chef’s restaurant, at the Castle Hotel to ask if any mussels would be coming today. I returned with disheartening news. Due to the dredging of the coastline, there were no mussels to be had. The next time mussels would be available would be the day after and even then, they would be in limited supply.
By this time, half the town had learned about my search for mussels. Try as they might, no one could find a single mussel. Many beers in, the despair from not finding mussels gave way to jokes about mussels and their cousin the cockle. Stewart said if I was really desperate I could try pickled mussels and pickled cockles. This led to more jokes and to Ms. TPOL going across the street for a few jars.
Hours later, it was time to say goodbye to my new friends and go to dinner for Wales’s other famous dish, the lamb. Before we did, Stewart had left and came back with more pickled mussels and cockles for our train ride home.
Guy on the left is called Sausage.
TPOL’s Tip: The Ye Olde Mail Coach needs no address. The town is tiny. You will find it.
Conwy by Night
The town is as charming at night as it is by day.
Lamb
The same restaurant that did not have the mussels did have the lamb. It was so good that I almost forgot about the mussels. Almost.
Family portrait.
Truffle fries
Gin for the Road
On the way out of town, I stopped by the former bank for my new favorite drink, grapefruit infused gin and soda. Make it a double. Then it was back to the train station for the hammered ride home.
Yes to gin.No to Aperol cocktail.Definite no to Wales whiskey.My vision.
The Guns & Butter Takeaway
I take it personally when I travel and what I am supposed to do does not go according to plan. Rationalize as I try, I am not happy until I see, taste, experience, what I came to see, taste or experience. In Madrid, they said the bullfight was sold out. I persisted until I found tickets (see Attending A Bullfight In Madrid: A Range of Emotions). In Zimbabwe, they said that all spots for the Devil’s Pool were taken. I wandered the town until I finally found a company to make the booking (see The Devil’s Pool Zambia: Loungin Atop Victoria Falls). In Conwy, I fell short of experiencing the mussels, despite this great story. While I am disappointed, the experience is consistent with the Guns & Butter Travel Guide, whereby I will never be able to see, do, and experience everything a place has to offer in the limited time I am there.
Is life finally going back to normal? I didn’t call recon when I applied for the Aeroplan 100k card (see Recon Calls, A Thing of the Past?). Days later, I was approved. Now I face, minimum spending hell (see Oops!… I Did It Again: Min Spending Hell) as I picked up two of these cards, another United Business, and another Amex Business Platinum. Life will really be back to normal when I actually use these damn points.
I have been all over northern Europe including Iceland, Sweden, and Finland. While I have not been to Norway, I can predict that it will not be as great as Denmark.
This is a placeholder for the Guns & Butter: Manchester Travel Guide. Unlike Belfast, where I actually saw the city by day, I did next to nothing in Manchester.
TPOL’s Guns & Butter Travel Guide is the best way to see as much as you can in as little time as possible. Here’s how it works – A trip is composed of two factors: Labor And Lazy. The opportunity cost (what is given up) for relaxing and being Lazy is gained by being adventurous in the form of Labor and vice versa. The guide includes inefficient activities i.e., tourist traps that should be avoided and aspirational activities that are worth doing but may be impossible to see given the constraints of time and resources.
This is a placeholder for the Guns & Butter: Manchester Travel Guide. Unlike Belfast, where I actually saw the city by day (see Guns & Butter: Belfast Travel Guide), I did next to nothing in Manchester. To be fair, the reason I came to Manchester was for logistics. It was a quick train ride to Wales (see Guns & Butter: Conwy Travel Guide) and a short flight to Milan, my next destination. With that disclaimer in mind, here is what I did:
Puerto Rico has terrible Chinese food. Like Belfast, where I had to get my fix of Indian food, I found great late-night Chinese food.
TPOL’s Tip: Chun Kwan is located at 177 Liverpool Road. Irlam Manchester M44 6DA
Here is what I want to do:
Attend/Teach at the University of Manchester
The area surrounding the Hyatt Regency is part of the University of Manchester’s campus. I loved walking around seeing students carrying coffee, lamenting their commute to class. It reminded me of my miserable time where I failed class after class at the University of Michigan (read Everyone’s Advice Is Wrong . . . Including Mine). If only I had come in the winter, then it would have been identical.
Bars
Throwback again. The streets are packed with bar after bar.
Food
British food may be bland but there were plenty of international restaurants that looked appetizing. I would guess that the pho is great in a cold, cloudy town.
Man City/Man U
For me, Manchester United is like Ohio State. I will not support them. I still would like to go to a game at Old Trafford. I attempted to adopt Man City but the fan base seemed to be more fair-weather than dedicated. Hence the name of the stadium, the Quiet House.
Overall
I did next to nothing in Manchester. It was a failure for content for a Guns & Butter Travel Guide, but like Calculus at UMich, I can always audit the post.
Due to Covid, I stopped applying for credit cards. Thanks to Covid, I found myself under 5 new accounts in 24 months. To stay there, I only applied for business cards. I broke from that strategy to apply for the Aeroplan 100k card with Chase. Instead of an instant approval, I received this:
I will not hop on the phone and plead for approval (see Chase Recon: How to Get It Done). On the contrary, I’m going to do nothing and hope for the best.
We’re closing in on the Final Four. I know 2 of the 5 who are in contention for a free trip to Puerto Rico. #4 is my editor who shamelessly picked Duke. #5 is my friend from Michigan who looks poised to win it all. Sadly, “IpreferOMAAT’ has little chance of winning [insert emoji] [insert ‘ugh’ pretext].
The Hyatt Regency is easily accessible by train from MAN airport. Take the train to Oxford Road and walk ten minutes.
Points
One day Hyatt will seriously devalue and ruin our lives (see Hyatt Regency Toronto: Please Don’t Devalue!). When I look back at this post and see I only spent 8k points for this hotel, I will be sad.
Location
Like the Moxy in Edinburgh, the Hyatt Regency is located in the middle of a college campus. Here that was the University of Manchester.
Room
The room, like TPOL, was smart chic.
Bathroom
LED bulb mirrors are everywhere now. It is also nice to see more hotels adapting rain showers instead of the loathsome stand-up tubs with a shower wand.
Regency Lounge
The lounge was closed due to Covid, but the bar downstairs was used as a replacement. It rivaled the experience of my favorite Regency lounge in Mexico City (see The Hyatt Regency Mexico City Review).
Overall
This hotel is a steal. Let’s hope it stays that way.
TPOL’s Guns & Butter Travel Guide is the best way to see as much as you can in as little time as possible. Here’s how it works – A trip is composed of two factors: Labor And Lazy. The opportunity cost (what is given up) for relaxing and being Lazy is gained by being adventurous in the form of Labor and vice versa. The guide includes inefficient activities i.e., tourist traps that should be avoided and aspirational activities that are worth doing but may be impossible to see given the constraints of time and resources.
I used to only write a Guns & Butter Travel Guide if I did a minimum number of things. I have come to realize that I will not be able to hit the minimum for every place I go. And that is okay. Indeed, that is the whole point of Guns & Butter. There’s a tradeoff. In Belfast, that tradeoff meant prioritizing what I could do the one night and one day I was there.
There aren’t any Indian restaurants in Puerto Rico, so when I read on Wikitravel that the oldest Indian restaurant, Archana, was recommended, I tried to make a reservation. Due to Covid, only delivery was available. This was the perfect excuse to delay my exploration of the city until the next day.
Troubles Tour
Once upon a time, the New York Times had a contest to have a lucky/unlucky someone visit 52 cities in 52 weeks. The point of this adventure was to see if a traveler could connect with a place despite being there for a short time. Since this is TPOL’s Travel Philosophy, I was shocked when I was not selected (see The Failing NYT Didn’t Hire TPOL: Sad!).
With only one day in Northern Ireland, I booked a private black taxi so I could begin to understand the conflict (see Troubles Tour Belfast). While I am far from a scholar now, I do have some understanding of the situation. To that end, I can say that I did something meaningful, if not profound, while I was there.
Peace Wall
Pub
No trip to the island of Ireland would be complete without a Guinness. That, along with traditional Irish food like bangers & mash and fish & chips was a great way to end the day.
A Pringles dispensary outside the bathroom?
TPOL’s Tip: The Kitchen Bar is located at 1 Victoria Square, Belfast BT1 4QG, United Kingdom.
To Do
If I had more time, I would have gone to The Giant’s Causeway, a wondrous rock formation. If I had more time and it wasn’t closed due to Covid, I may have checked out the Titanic Tour, the place the ill-fated ship was built. It is not a tour of the Titanic itself. Rather, it is a history of the shipping industry and its decline. Since time was limited, I walked around the city center and tried to comprehend how life looked seemingly normal despite the fact that in the Western world, in the United Kingdom there are gates that close off neighborhoods at 7PM.
Overall
I didn’t do much in terms of quantity but what I saw and what I learned was unmatched.
TPOL’s Tip: Chun Kwan is located at 177 Liverpool Road. Irlam Manchester M44 6DA
