Southwest Devaluation: Gotta Get Away

This is the intro to the Trip Report,Ā The Southwest Companion Pass: Round 3, which focuses on burning SWA RapidReward points after their confusing devaluation. I kick it off with this overview:Ā A Wedding in Scottsdale: Saying ā€œI Doā€ to PointsĀ 
Imaginary trip planning is one of my favorite hobbies because I get to fantasize about where I can go. The problem with the points game is transitioning from being a curator of points, putting them on display for all to see, and heeding sound advice: Shut Up and Book! Luckily, airlines and hotels intervene by way of devaluations, incidentally freeing us of our hoarding ways. Though weĀ gripe and groan about the injustice of making free becoming less free, we really should be thanking the power players for encouraging us toĀ get away. Those who are paranoid of the devaluationĀ who plan tomorrow’s vacation today realize the greatest dividends in the points biosphere (see $77,000 Trip Heard Round the World). Those who preemptively book following news of a devaluation find themselves on an unanticipated adventure (see Round the World Dividends from the Geographically Challenged). Which brings us to Southwest Airlines who announced they are going to essentially freestyle their awards chart. So what do we do? Tweet at Southwest that bags and humans should both fly free? No. We should imaginary trip plan. And if anyone’s interested here’s what I’ve come up with. The Mission: burn 87,244 SWA points. The Target: complete the following Trip Report: The Southwest Companion Pass Round 3 (see Round 1 & Round 2) by going to:
  • Punta Cana, Dominican Republic
  • Montego Bay, Jamaica
  • Mexico City, Mexico
  • Las Vegas, Nevada
  • Belize City, Belize*
That will add three more to the Country Count ListĀ and take me to Mexico City, a place I’ve wanted to visit for a long time. The Plan: I’m assuming somehow I’ll be in the neighborhood of Chicago when I begin and that before April 17th, Belize will be a destination of Southwest.

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southwest devaluation
The Proposed Itinerary
Devaluation? I think not.

Ā Onto ‘A Wedding in Scottsdale: Saying ā€œI Doā€ to Points’==>

 

UnFare-Gate And the DOT

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This silly story won’t go away or maybe I, along with many others won’t let it go. Unless you’ve been living in Denmark, you probably are aware that the mistake fares which provided a golden chariot from London to the US for next to nothing was cancelled by United. Readers grew irritable that I poked fun at the obscene amount of blog coverage the story received. Perspective was lost as people were up in arms that serious blogging is about addressing the issue at hand not classless buzzfeed headlines. Though it is doubtful those readers are reading this, I would like to invoke a famous State Farm employee’s words and say R-E-L-A-X. As is the case with State Farm’s counterpart, Mr. Brady, Un-Fare Gate won’t go away. United is blaming it on the equipment Forex manager saying that it was a third-party who incorrectly stated the conversion of Denmark Krones to USD. Therefore they are within their legal rights to cancel all reservations made as a consequence of said error. You purchased a ticket through the Danish version of united.com during the time when the prices were incorrect. As a result, we are not able to honor your ticket at the price that you paid. Not since George Soros almost bankrupted the Bank of England has a Forex miscalculation gone so awry. Fluctuation in currency occur at the smallest of levels (called pips for fellow traders) so it is unthinkable that such an egregious and elementary mistake could have been made. It’s my contention that United should have honored the fares and held this third-party group of imbeciles liable for the error of their ways. I must have put a decimal point in the wrong place or something. Shit. I always do that. I always mess up some mundane detail. -Michael Bolton of  United’s 3rd Party Sacrificial Lamb  So where do we go from here? Well, ThePointsGuy offers directions on how to file a complaint with the DOT which is what I did. Why? Because sometimes we make mistakes booking a ticket and we call and cancel and plead our case  only to hear that we still have to pay a change fee. Let them feel our frustration for a change (pun intended) even if it is on a much grander scale.

WTF United, I want to see Piccadilly
WTF United, I want to see Piccadilly


 

 
                

Why Is New York So Expensive?

When I’m not breaking the Internet by announcing fake breaking news that people have taken too seriously (please post your angry comments on that thread), I, much to my chagrin, have to travel for work. Next month, my duty as an officer of the court takes me to New York City. New York is not my favorite city in the world, it’s not even in my top ten. (So much for no controversy.) Why don’t I like New York as much as other big cities like Shanghai, Hong Kong, Cape Town, Bangkok, or Flint, Michigan? The reason is that New York is unreasonably expensive. While hotels in similarly posh cities like Singapore or Tokyo charge just as much for the rooms, the level of quality is beyond compare. Check into any SPG hotel with platinum status in Asia and the room upgrade is over the top (see W Doha). Check into an SPG in New York and due to availability the chances of securing an upgrade are far less promising. In my experience, the same is true across all big brands though I’ll hold out judgment on Hyatt till after my stay at the Park Hyatt NYC. Besides the false sense of entitlement of status being overlooked, my real issue is why isn’t there just a solid Aloft Manhattan Downtown that is reasonably priced? That way I can do my work, stay comfortably, and save the cash and points for unprofessional trips… http://www.aloftmanhattandowntown.com/ Well I’ll be… Depending on the nightly rate, maybe I won’t hate New York so much after all. As luck would have it, the Aloft Manhattan Downtown opens a week after I leave.

aloft manhattan downtown
Hmm if the Aloft Brooklyn is 269, then I doubt the price will be sweeter in Downtown.
 

United IS Honoring the Fare!

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Flag_of_Antigua_and_Barbuda.svg Oh Lord, Lord, call of the barking dogs. United is honoring the fare! After the hooplah of this morning’s unbelievable deal from London to the US for next to nothing subsided, yours truly found another gem by changing the country of booking from the United States to Antigua. Sure they cancelled my great trip from LHR-SEA but who can beat first-class out of DTW! I’m writing this post not for click-bait but to posit the question, is it necessary for everyone to broadcast the bad news or if ten bloggers doing so is sufficient? See you in Chicago. Capture

Making Mistakes in Booking Mistake Fares

Ah the Danish, what a lovely people. It’s 2nd and goal from the 2 yard line and instead of handing off the ball you decide to go for glory by double checking your calendar, going to seatguru for recs of where to sit, and double back because you’d rather fly Lufthansa first than United first. Now that you have the perfect play set to go, you fumble for a card that needs some love to hit the minimum spend and start fantasizing about how great it will be to fly first-class for $100 instead of $8000+, not to mention that it doesn’t require any points. Error What happened? Let me try this again. Maybe seat 2A wasn’t available. Error  Greed is the downfall for all. Those that tried to be too clever instead of going with Beast Mode are kicking themselves for not capitalizing on what potentially could be a next to nothing round trip to London. When TPG tweets, “mistake fare” your only reaction should be book. Where, when, how, with whom, is all irrelevant. Not only do these mistake fares disappear within minutes of showing up but also the chances of the airline honoring the fares is 50/50. Furthermore, if you did book LHR to DTW and realized that nobody wants to go to Michigan, you can still cancel within 24 hours at no penalty. So for those who feel a bit deflated after missing out on that opportunity, fret not, there’s still great deals by selecting Antigua and going from DTW to ORD.Capture      

True Detective: The Case of [Un]Lucky’s Mom’s Purse

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Unless you have been flying coach, you probably have heard of the golden boy, Lucky’s blog, called One Mile at a Time. Indeed, Lucky and a hand full of other prominent bloggers initiated me into the underworld of points. That is why today I was irritated when I heard that his mother had been robbed at the W Barcelona. Here is my understanding of the facts: The details are creepy but essentially a confidence man approached Lucky’s mom at the hotel while Lucky was working in the room. He had a curious conversation about his flight from Dubai to Singapore that coincidentally Lucky and his mom were also on. From there it gets stranger as the man invites Lucky’s mom for some coffee, an innocent request on its face. She returned to the room and informed Lucky of the circumstances and he advised her to stay away. Lucky heads out for the evening. His mom is in the room when she hears a knock on the door. Sure enough it’s the weird man again who relentlessly asks her to come out to dinner. Annoyed at his presence and wanting to be rid of him, she goes with him to the lobby where he insists on taking her for dinner. Citing the weather, she says that even if she did want to go out she couldn’t because it was a bit chilly outside. The weird man who is growing ever weirder says he will buy her a coat and return to take her out. Apprehensive, Lucky’s mom heads back to the room and locks the doors. Interestingly, the phone keeps ringing and it is assumed it was the man calling. Lucky’s mom refuses to answer. Lucky eventually returns to the room and finds the key no longer works. Security has to let him in His mom was asleep but her purse has gone missing. What gives? First, I am relieved that Lucky’s mom is fine. I could only imagine what my mom would do in such a situation. Having said that, I would posit that this heist was not random but premeditated. There are too many peculiarities that the True Detective must analyze.

  • The Target: It is my opinion that Lucky not his mother was the target of this heist. The plan was to get Lucky’s mom out of the room and rob Lucky blind while both of them were out.
  • The Stolen Property, the purse: The details of this are still unclear. Lucky goes on to say that his mom allowed the stranger to enter the room and use the bathroom before accompanying him to the lobby. Could it have been lifted during this time?
  • The Plan
    • The soft target: Lucky’s mom: The weird man fabricated the fantastic story of being on the same flight as Lucky and his mom in order to put her at ease. As others have pointed out, it seems rather likely that the man tracked Lucky’s trip via social media and was lying in wait for his arrival. With a picture profile of Lucky, he was able to wait for him to arrive at the W, make a positive ID on his mother then wait for Lucky to leave before engaging her in conversation.
    • The room number: It really isn’t difficult to ascertain the room number of a hotel guest. I’m always happy when a hotel doesn’t follow protocol and gives me my friend or family’s room number so I can send them something or just show up as a surprise. Hotels should only offer to connect you to the room without disclosing the number. In any event, if this was the planned plot that I suspect that it was then another participant could have surreptitiously followed Lucky to his room to find out where it was.
    • The room key: Assuming the purse wasn’t stolen from her person, it must have been taken from the room. Here’s how the perpetrators could have gained access.
      • “I forgot my key in the room, my name is, my room number is…” amazingly works without showing of ID or by saying simple details like a birth date.
      • The key was stolen.
      • The key was copied.
        • This is the most probable explanation. When a key card is created at a hotel and is replaced, the original card no longer works and the new card becomes the only means of accessing the room. This scenario is consistent with Lucky’s account of events who discovers that his key isn’t working when he returns to the room in the evening.
    • The Phone Calls: Lucky presumes that it was the man who kept calling the room which lines up with my theory. The man was trying his best to get Lucky’s mom out of the room so his co-conspirator would have unbridled access to the room.
  • Missing Piece 
    • It seems that surveillance will solve this riddle quite quickly. Did someone besides Lucky and his mom gain access to the room? If not then that doesn’t disprove my theory that the original target was Lucky. Remember, we are assuming the man kept calling the room in an effort to get Lucky’s mom to join him.
    • It wouldn’t have shocked me had Lucky’s mom went out for dinner that the stranger would’ve furthered the scam by giving her back her purse claiming he magically found it.
  • Inside Job? 
    • I doubt it.
  • My Theory
    • Thieves knew Lucky was coming to W Barcelona, how he was getting there, and who he was traveling with. They lied in wait for their arrival. One guy tracked Lucky to the room to ascertain the room number. The other made friendly conversation with Lucky’s mom about Lucky’s hobby thereby gaining the degree of trust needed to enter her room later in the evening.
    • The purse was stolen during this time.
    • The weird man tried to get Lucky’s mom to go to dinner. She refused. This is where the plot was foiled. Had she complied, someone would’ve had complete access to the room. This would’ve been possible either because they had Lucky’s mom’s key or because they managed to convince the front desk to get them a new one.
  • Lesson 
    • While bloggers are hardly celebrities, they are soft targets. Public social media makes you an easy target especially when anyone and everyone knows who you are. This gives the opportunity to plot a pretty elementary scheme to take advantage of the information that you have volunteered.
  • My Advice 
    • Put the room under an assumed name. Make it a point to have the hotel note that access to the room should not be given without proper identification.
DSC02529    

Winter Beerfest A-Brewin

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Hold tight everyone. I know that you are anxiously waiting for the Academy Awards of Brew to begin but late word of new entrants have made starting the contest on time impossible. This weekend a local craft brew festival is a-brewin in a small town in these United States and ThePointsOfLife will be on the red carpet ushering in one micro after another. Indie films like Little Miss Sunshine came out of the Sundance Film Festival so who is to say that the best beer throughout the galaxy won’t be discovered in this small town’s celebration. In the interest of science, I beg of you to be patient and wait for all the ballots to be counted. If the event is a success, you may have to wait a few more days in order for me to be of sound mind to make an accurate assessment. Cheers, TPOL Capture    

Is Expedia’s ‘No Excuses’ Ad Promoting Our Hobby?

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I actually have a lot of unused vacation days but where am I going to go? I just don’t have the money to travel right now. I usually just go back home to see my parents so I can’t exactly go globetrotting. If I had friends to go with I’d go but I don’t want to travel by myself. Someday… There are no more excuses. Find the hotel you want, and the flight you want and we’ll find the savings to get you there. The ad resonates with me as a points journeyman and world explorer not because I took my own advice and gave myself infinite vacation days but because the message is true: there are no more excuses. Scan any Prior2Boarding or BoardingArea blogger’s website and all the tools necessary to make the Expedia dream come true are right there at your fingertips. The notable difference between Expedia and us is our definition of savings or in this case additions: Lounge access: Check First-class: Check Room upgrade: Check DSC05626          

SQ Givenchy Pajamas: By Air, By Land

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A niche topic of no interest to anyone except for particular travelers is when to change into the airline issued pajamas while in flight. Googling “When to change into pajamas on an airplane” yields 1,580,000 million results.

singapore airlines givenchy pajamas
What is the SEO optimization phrase for such a query, I wonder.
This will not be post 1,580,001 though I will not call out anyone who wants to spend half an afternoon calculating, analyzing, and subsequently posting on the optimal time to change into pj’s on a plane. Anything that advances the science of flying whether it be another post of champagne on a plane or snakes on a plane shouldn’t be dismissed simply because it is redundant. Losing your virginity in business class is a rite of passage that is unique and special to each of us even if the resulting report appears to be a carbon copy of everyone else’s. Having said that, I always enjoy a twist on these typical topics which is why some of my Hotel Reviews are written the way they are. (see Park Hyatt Sydney) With the conclusion of Sunday’s sermon on the need for tolerance for fellow bloggers’ right to write whatever they want without passive aggressive postings by others hypocritical bloggers who do the same, it’s time to discuss the subject at hand: pajamas on a plane. singapore airlines givenchy pajamas For me, it’s not when you put your pajamas on but the appropriate time to change back into your suit and tie. Is it when you hear the captain’s announcement, “Flight attendants please prepare the cabin for arrival.” Not for me. I keep the Givenchy’s on through immigration, out of the airport, all the way to my final destination. The stares I receive from other passengers and airport security are the same as fans who can’t help but gawk at larger than life celebrities. “That guy flew SQ suite-class, wow.” My insistence on wearing the SQ garb and milking the celebrity of the greatest pajamas known to man extends beyond the airport. I wear them to the gym, to the bar, and to dining establishments both high-end and low. Incidentally, the only time I don’t wear the pajamas is to bed because they are made of some thermal warming fiber capable of warding off Mongolian freezing temperatures. Such is my love for these pajamas that I went to the Givenchy store in Hong Kong to purchase another pair. The salesperson smugly looked at me and said, “We don’t sell pajamas,” clearly demonstrating how little she knew about high fashion. Today my concern (as I write this post from a coffee shop sporting my over-worn jammies), is how to acquire another pair. Though I’ve flown first-class on many airlines who offer more amenities than Singapore, none have come close to offering the couture of SQ. Here’s to hoping that Amex comes out with another 100k offer.
singapore airlines givenchy pajamas
What’s the point of a shower on board when you have to change into substandard pajamas?
     

Get Swoll: A Repat’s Guide to Returning Healthy

As an expat living abroad presented many challenges:

Returning to the United States, the biggest challenge is how to not go out of my mind from utter boredom. At the same time, an advantage of my temporary stay in the US witness protection program is an opportunity to get back to the fundamentals of living healthy. In Mongolia, the gym was a Soviet-esque bunker with mismatched weights and strange characters who took breaks from squats to play the Mongolia cello. healthy diet at work The grocery store was a haggler’s paradise. Cabbage could cost $.50 one day then $3 the next if you either didn’t arrive with exact change or weren’t savvy enough to shop around. Day-to-day grocery shopping was more exciting than playing the commodities future market. And if you do find the right item at the right price, then snatch it up quickly because it is guaranteed that it won’t be there next time and the time after. Anyone still want to move to Mongolia? But enough of my Tall Tales from Mongolia life, this post is about appreciating how easy it is to get swoll when living in the United Sates. All you need are two things:
  1. the diet
  2. a gym
The Diet I have grown to resent my friends who live in the US and complain about their inability to get in shape because they are too busy working at their cubicle to adhere to a healthy diet at work. Why do I show them no compassion? First, why haven’t they read the book? Second, the US has this magical marketplace called Costco and Amazon that streamline the process of buying groceries at absurdly cheap prices. Even with this, maybe these subscribers of cubicle-sim truly don’t have the time to prepare dinner every day, maybe they don’t want to wake up for breakfast or prepare themselves a lunch. I’ve long known the solution for these excuse makers. It’s called Egg Whites International. Egg Whites International will ship you pure liquid, refrigerated egg whites straight to your door with prices comparable to buying the 6 pack of egg whites from Costco. The difference between these whites and those of Costco is the ability to drink them straight out of the pump. They have absolutely no taste, have zero risk of Salmonella, and can be completely digested safely by the human body. I’ve been purchasing liquid egg whites from this company for so long that the CEO Mac personally emailed me when I was in Mongolia wondering why I hadn’t reupped on my usual order. Back in the US, I ordered 4 gallons of whites and am all set to get after it. healthy diet at work For all you cubicle-ist excuse makers out there, here’s the daily diet that can change your life. (ThePointsOfLife is not a physician. Though his father and sister are, the house of learned doctors does not include him. He is, of course, an attorney, so the disclaimer: consult a physician before trying the diet must be provided.) The Cubicle-Ism Diet (Trademark 2015. All rights reserved.) Breakfast 6 squirts of liquid egg whites, 1.5 scoops of whey protein Lunch  see breakfast, add a cup of raw broccoli  Afternoon Snack  1 scoop of whey protein, broccoli optional  Dinner  6oz chicken breast, 1 cup of broccoli  Late Snack  Protein shake + did someone say broccoli?  Refeed Day  Every third day, combine dinner and your late snack for whatever your carb heart desires. I go with 2 foot long sandwiches from Subway. They give me all the carbs I need and are not so delicious that I’m tempted to eat there every day. Is that too much synthetic protein?  Personally, I try to avoid protein powders because I’d rather get my protein from tuna, chicken breast, and other lean proteins but this is the Cubicle-Ism Diet and acting like an uncreative robot both at work and while eating is required.
healthy diet at work
Leave the cubicle and leave the protein powder too.
The Gym This is worth spending all but two seconds on because the US doesn’t have a shortage of affordable gyms. Go find one. Even with the shiny new key tag from L.A. Fitness the conforming cubicle-ist is unrelenting in complaining that he doesn’t have time to go to the gym. Going on your lunch hour is feasible and recommended but if you have an excuse for not doing that, then go immediately after work. What about happy hour?  Exactly, you do have time to go. And if you’re tired, it’s called NO-Xplode. healthy diet at work Stop being a dough boy and get your life together. That way when you do move to Azerbaijan you give yourself a chance to adapt to whatever gyms, diets, and who knows what else comes your way.