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Expat Lessons: Shanghai

Expat Lessons Shanghai is part of the TPOL in Shanghai Trip Report. Like I do with each trip (see TPOL’s Travel Lessons) on each expat assignment, I will write a recap of the lessons learned from living abroad (see TPOL’s Expat Lessons).


This was my first expat move since leaving Mongolia in 2014. Life lessons were learned there but that’s for my next book, not the blog (buy Everyone’s Advice Is Wrong . . . Including Mine). Here’s what I learned in Shanghai this time around.

Accommodations

My expat plan was to stay in one place for the whole month. I wanted to establish a routine. I also wanted to spend less than $1500 if possible. The garbage Airbnb ruined that (see Airbnb Long-Term? Never Again: My Shanghai Experience). I rationalized paying more for a hotel (see U Hotel Xintiandi: Decent for a Long Stay in Shanghai), and then with Citi’s 4th Night Free expiring, I rationalized paying more to receive TPOL style amenities including better Wifi (see Renaissance Yu Garden Shanghai: A Comprehensive Review & Courtyard Shanghai Central: Nice, But Not So Central). In the end, I paid $2000 for 27 nights.

a room with a large window and a city skyline
I need this view again but in an apartment, not a hotel.

TPOL’s TIP: Pay the premium to live like you do at home. Otherwise, you will waste time and ultimately cost yourself money by jumping from place to place.

Gym

I stopped working out completely because I did not have a stable home or routine. I eventually found a place to work out, but it was too late. I had turned into a dumpling by then (see Z & B Fitness: TRX Training in Shanghai).

a sign in front of a building
I spent my first two weeks in Shanghai working out my dance skills. I didn’t implement the workout plan until late into my tenure.

TPOL’s TIP: Stick to the same gym schedule as home.

Clothes

I only packed my normal carry on. I showed up with nothing clean, and after a few nights it was unbearable. Instead of going to the Fabric Market and staying fresh, I went to H&M. There’s a reason the shirts are $7. Wash them once and they shrink and remain permanently wrinkled.

a man holding a suitcase standing on a street
I came away knowing that when it comes to bargaining, I still got it

TPOL’s TIP: Showing up with no clothes was a good idea but like the accommodations, buying cheap garbage from H&M was not a solution. Go to the Fabric Market right away.

Schedule

My life in Puerto Rico is hectic. Every Tuesday I have to go down the waterslide at the resort pool #slidetuesdays. I also have to golf three times a week and workout five times a week. There isn’t much to do in Shanghai besides party (see TPOL’s Guide to Libations in Shanghai) and eat street food (see Cheap Eats Shanghai: Morning, Day, Night, Morning Again). In theory, I should have been more productive in this city life than island life. Between trying to find a suitable home and gym, I was not able to get into a rhythm. I tried to change my work schedule to accommodate these disruptions and ended up doing less than at home. Next time, I know to keep the gym and work schedule the same. I only need to change the hours of operation. So long as I hit my weekly goals, it doesn’t matter if I stay out all night and start the workday at 6PM.

a group of people standing outside a building

TPOL’s TIP: Meet the same work goals as home.

Time Zone Is My Friend

Unlike the stupidity of Nepal’s 45 minute time difference (see A 45 Minute Time Difference in Kathmandu? Stupidity Knows No Bounds), Shanghai’s 12 hour time difference with New York is very convenient. When it’s night in China, it is the workday in NY. Being twelve hours ahead keeps me ahead of my adversaries.

a yellow container with dice on it
Breakfast

Finances

I am up in the air if I want to put my ocean view on Airbnb when I live the expat life. I know what an annoying tenant I was, and I am not sure I want anyone living in my house. However, it becomes expensive to live like a king abroad when I have to pay rent and a mortgage.

Banking

I need to figure out how to get a Chinese bank account. It is too inconvenient to live there without one (see Without Technology TPOL’s the Creepy Old Guy in Shanghai).

Networking

Before I go on my next expat assignment, I need to set expectations for what I plan to achieve by being in that location. Am I still trying to work remotely but just in a new environment? Or am I trying to expand into an international market? If it’s the latter, I need to set up meetings before I go.

Overall

In 2010, I left Shanghai and swore to come back as a successful expat. I tried to do it with General Motors and was fired within five months of taking a job in Warren, Michigan. Nine years later I did it myself working as TPOL and Bachuwa Law. I give myself an A for seeing it through but a B- for what I accomplished when I was there.

Next time will be better.

a city skyline with water and blue sky

 

 

 

 

 

Four Points Shanghai, Daning: The Best TPOL’s Seen

Four Points Shanghai Hotel Review is part of both ANA, Take Me ‘Round the World Trip Report and the TPOL in Shanghai Trip Report.


Getting There: This is not the Four Points in Pudong. It is located at 1928 Gong He Xin Road. Take the Maglev and then the metro from the airport.

a sign on a wall


Why am I always given suite upgrades when I least need or want them (see Hyatt Centric Fisherman’s Wharf San Francisco: I Hate Suite ReviewingHyatt Regency Reagan Airport: A (Pointless) Suite Upgrade)? After my epic trek through Bhutan and Nepal, I had one more night in Shanghai. I stayed at the Four Points Daning because the price was right and I wanted an inexpensive, but comfortable place to lay my head before going back to the US.

Hotel Itself 

The hotel is beautiful. Dare I say that it is the nicest Four Points in the world? It’s certainly the nicest I have ever seen. a large chandelier in a lobby a lobby with a desk and chairs

Suite 

From trekking through the mountains to this beautiful suite, TPOL has traveled a long way. a close up of buttons on a elevator a living room with couches and a coffee table a living room with a couch and table a table with chairs and a vase of flowers a living room with a couch and a televisiona basket of wine and wine glasses a coffee maker and some bags a plant in a blue vase

Soap 

From being filthy and stinky to having soap, TPOL needs a shower. a group of small bottles of shampooa group of bottles and a towel on a counter a bathroom with a mirror and sink a white towel on a rack

Bed 

Unfortunately, I can’t sleep long because I have an early flight in the AM. Why can’t I stay longer?a room with a bed and a televisiona bed in a rooma room with a tv and a chair a room with a bed and a chair a bed in a room

Breakfast 

One more binge of food is a fitting tribute to end this great time.a group of people in a restaurant a table with food on it a group of baskets of wheat a plate of food on a table a plate of dumplings a pan of dumplings on a stove a plate of sausages and sausages a bowl of rice with meat and eggs a bowl of noodles with olives a sink with a faucet running water and utensils a buffet with bowls of food a group of bowls of food a plate of food on a table a plate of food on a table

Bye Shanghai 

TPOL in Shanghai was a success. Now it’s time to go home.a city with many tall buildings

Overall 

If you’re a tourist coming to Shanghai, this is not the hotel for you. If you want to sit back and relax after being on the road or if you’re traveling for business, check out the Four Points. a building with windows


Four Points Shanghai Hotel Review is part of both ANA, Take Me ‘Round the World Trip Report and the TPOL in Shanghai Trip Report.

China Southern’s Pork Dumpling Flight Review

China Southern Flight Review is part of the ANA, Take Me ‘Round the World Trip Report.


Does anyone care that I didn’t write a Flight Review for KTM to CAN on China Southern in economy? I really doubt it.

a sign in a building

a close up of a plane
I did take this picture though.

While I wrote a review about the Priority Pass Lounge in Guangzhou, I passed on writing about the preceding flight. I will write a quick review of my experience from CAN back to PVG because the snack was an oversized pork dumpling ( that came in a plastic bag. I’ve had dim sum on Cathay but never a dumpling.

How did it stack up to Yang’s or Yu Garden? I will say that it stacked up quite well. Like a street dumpling, it was soft on the outside and juicy on the inside. Giant dumplings on an airplane – who would of thought? What’s next, lobster thermidor on a plane (see Singapore Airlines A380 Suite Class, My Turn)?

a bag and banana on a table
It’s technically a bao, not a dumpling but I say they are related.

Easy-Boarding Lounge Guangzhou: Don’t Pass on This Priority (If It’s Open)

Priority Pass Guangzhou Lounge Review is part of the ANA, Take Me ‘Round the World Trip Report.


It’s the final countdown. The ANA Take Me ‘Round the World Trip is almost over. From Kathmandu I flew to Guangzhou, my second favorite city in China next to Shanghai (see Where to Party in Guangzhou!). I had a few hours in the Priority Pass lounge, called the Easy-boarding Lounge.a sign on a wall

I arrived just in time for the last call for food. Mind you, I have been on the road since August 4th so I showed up as the Fat Guy in the Lounge. The servings of kung pao and made-to-order soup did not help matters. In fairness to me, I had a Coke Zero.a food in a container a person standing behind a window plates of food on a table a bowl of soup with vegetables and noodles

There are plenty of places to sit and there’s a shower should you feel the need to rinse off all the dirt you acquired from trekking (Guns & Butter: Pokhara, Nepal Travel Guide (Cautionary Edition), Guns & Butter: Kathmandu Travel Guide (Bargaining Edition), & Guns & Butter: Bhutan Travel Guide (Happiness Edition)). a sign on a tile wall a room with a desk and chair a room with chairs and tables a room with chairs and a painting on the wall a circular object in a room a room with chairs and a television

Overall

I know I am harsh on Priority Pass sometimes (see Priority Pass Jakarta Lounge Review: Yuck), but this was a good lounge to begin the end of my journey.

TPOL’s TIP: This lounge is better than the Priority Pass Premium Lounge in Guangzhou.

TPOL’s TIP: OMAAT reports that Priority Pass holders can no longer access lounges in Guangzhou.


Priority Pass Guangzhou Lounge Review is part of the ANA, Take Me ‘Round the World Trip Report.

Simply The Best: July 2020

Previously, I told you the worst of July. Here’s the best.

  1. Kasalta Puerto Rico: My Favorite Bakery, Deli, Coffee Shop, Wine Bar, Sandwich Shop, And Place to Hang Out

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    Don’t be surprised if you go in for a sandwich and leave with a $100 bill.
  2. Paragliding Pokhara: Born to Be Alive

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    Now I’ve been paragliding. What is there left to do?
  3. House Hunters Puerto Rico: Bored in Beautiful Bahia Beach

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    There is golf. There is a beach. Two out of three prerequisites for my home search were met. There’s definitely and most certainly no nightlife in Bahia. People come here to get away and stay away.
  4. Rip-off Alert: Golfing in the Himalayas

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    This place is a joke. It’s like if my dad said he would build me a pool in my backyard and just dug a hole and filled it with water. I played 4 holes and asked for my money back. I was told no.
  5. Guns & Butter: Kathmandu Travel Guide (Bargaining Edition)

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    TPOL is one and done with Kathmandu. I got more than I bargained for.
  6. House Hunters Puerto Rico: Ocean Park, Nice Until It Floods

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    The beautiful beach around the corner also had me thinking less about golf.
  7. House Hunters Puerto Rico: TPOL Finds His Home
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    And that is why moving to Puerto Rico was one of my best life choices.

    If you’re responsibly socially distancing yourself from misinformation and need something to do, buy my relaunched book, Everyone’s Advice Is Wrong . . . Including Mine.

OMAAT: The Hell Journey from Chitwan to Kathmandu

OMAAT: The Hell Journey from Chitwan to Kathmandu is part of the ANA, Take Me ‘Round the World Trip Report.


The eight-hour drive from Chitwan to Kathmandu gives a new meaning to the expression “one mile at a time.” It took that long to go 60 miles. If I were in Olympic shape, I could have run there faster.

What happened? First, the roads in Nepal are awful. Second, most are one lane which leads to a never-ending game of chicken. Third, there was construction on the pass connecting the two towns. The construction only allowed traffic in one way. More than once, the driver turned off the car, exited the vehicle, and only returned to move the car three feet. One time, I thought we were going to move because buses and cars were honking. As it turned out, the driver in front of us had fallen asleep. When he woke up, he moved his car ten feet and we waited some more.a view from the front of a car at night

The flight from Chitwan to KTM is 25 minutes. My fear was that it would be cancelled (see Nepal Domestic Flight Misery), and I would miss my flight to Shanghai. This, apparently, was the better alternative.

a football player on a field
The only thing that moved slower that day was Michigan’s shitty offense against Wisconsin.

Overall

What a nightmare. We left at 4PM, were supposed to arrive at 8PM, but didn’t check in until after midnight.

The One-Horned Rhino: My Safari in Chitwan, Nepal

One-Horned Rhino is part of the ANA, Take Me ‘Round the World Trip Report.


A 3-hour drive from Pokhara is Chitwan National Park. It was the final stop on my tour of Nepal. My reason for going was to see the one-horned rhino. The advertisements say there are tigers but from what I read they are rarely in season. The cost of the two hour Jeep tour was 10k rupees ($83) for 2 people, 4k ($33) of which was the ticket to the park.

Before going, we were able to eat lunch and rest at the Eden Resort. a building with a sign on ita bed with a floral design on it a map of nepal on a wall a glass of beer next to a bottle a tray of food with a sauce and a bowl of soup

a plate of food on a table
More momo

At lunch, our guide came to us and asked if we wanted to see the rhinos. Confused, I said yes but the safari starts at 1PM. He said, “No, right now. They are here. Leave your beer.” I didn’t see rhinos in Africa (see Kenyan Safaris Are Expensive: Mara & Amboseli Price Summary) so I quickly followed him out of the restaurant and across the street. Sure enough, there were two rhinos meandering about. The guide warned us from going too close. Days before a local was killed when a rhino charged. Though these pictures aren’t the greatest, they will have to do on account of staying alive.a rhinoceros walking in a forest two rhinos walking on a dirt road in front of a building a rhinoceros in a grassy area with trees and a building

Other Nepalese tourists didn’t care about getting close and took selfies much closer than I was. No thank you.

On the way back, we saw rhino dung. The guide shared that magic mushrooms grow on it.a pile of dirt and plants

The stress of going on a safari is the pressure of not seeing the animals I’ve come to see. Here I saw what I came to see so I was able to enjoy the safari.

Driver

Our driver was an interesting fellow. People know that they should not text and drive. How about watching this interesting video? He was certainly resourceful. Besides multi-tasking, he did change a tire that blew out during our safari.a truck with chairs on the back a man in a white shirt a tire on a vehicle a green truck with chairs under a shelter

Animals

I saw different kinds of deer, antelope, lizards, snakes, birds, and one alligator. I didn’t see a tiger as predicted, nor did I see the long nose croc as I had hoped to see. As I only use my phone for taking pictures, I didn’t bother taking photos of animals far off in the distance. I also am against digital zoom. If the subject isn’t within a few feet, no photo will be taken.a sign with a crocodile and a crocodile in the water

a body of water with trees in the background
Croc?

Views

Like Kenya, my favorite parts of the safaris are the trees and the panoramic views.a green field with bushes and treesa green field with tall grass and bushes a truck parked in a grassy field a river with grass and trees in the background a grassy field with white flowers and a river

Rhinos

Whenever we would come across an animal, the guide would tap his ring on the jeep. The driver would stop. Magically, he could see things I would’ve missed even if I had all the time in the world. The best discovery was a mother and baby rhino. The mother came close to the jeep. This was good for pictures but could have been detrimental to my health.

a green forest with trees and bushes
Get down! Shut up!

two rhinoceros in the woods a rhinoceros in a grassy area a rhino standing in a grassy area a rhinoceros standing in tall grass a rhinoceros in a grassy area a rhinoceros standing in the grass with Kaziranga National Park in the background a rhinoceros walking through tall grass

TPOL’s TIP: Don’t wear bright orange/reddish pants on safari. Or do because they attract rhinos.

Overall

I was lucky. I came for rhino. I saw rhino.

TPOL’s TIP: I hired a driver to take me from Pokhara to Chitwan to Kathmandu for 15k rupees ($125). The day started at 6:30AM and ended at midnight (see OMAAT: The Hell Journey from Chitwan to Kathmandu).

Simply The Worst: July 2020

Everyone should be outraged at what the United States has become. 1000 people are dying a day for COVID. We are a joke to the world, and we only have ourselves to blame for accepting this sad reality (see Stop Going to the Bar Jerks!). With that grim outlook, I give you the worst posts from July 2020. They all come from The Lost & Found Year(s): Covid Trip Report, the only trip report I have since Americans have been locked out from most of the world, and for good reason (see Travel Or Stay Inside? TPOL’s Thoughts on Coronavirus, written on 2/26/2020 and Do I Stay Or Do I Go? Thoughts on the Second Covid Wave, written on 4/23/2020). Don’t act like I never told ya.

Infected Tourists Are Coming to Puerto Rico

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Tourist dollars aren’t worth the death toll that will certainly follow.

Frontier Airlines: The Covid Super Spreader for Puerto Rico

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“We’re all in this together.” Those words were bullshit then and they are even more hollow now.

Post TPOL, Frontier Erases Alfredo’s Adventure to Puerto Rico

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Stay home. Stay away.

Back on Lockdown in Puerto Rico

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Why are people coming here in the first place? It’s raining everyday, there are sandstorms, it’s hurricane season, bars are closed, and the there are man-eating iguanas everywhere. Stay away.

Can I Go Visit Puerto Rico?

a black background with white text
The original message was more on point.

Sorry Harbaugh, College Football Should Be Cancelled

The Horseshoe
If Harbuagh wants to deal with COVID, the only way to do so is to cancel the season this fall. While life without college football will be depressing, the good news is we won’t lose to Ohio State again.

Dispelling Puerto Rico’s ‘Covid Crisis’: Tweeting @NYT Worked

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I don’t know why the NYT and other publications feel the need to sensationalize headlines about Puerto Rico, which is why I proceeded to tweet at the author of the article expressing my frustration.

What I Look Forward To

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Pandemic, pandemic, pandemic. It never ends and there’s nothing to do besides order nonsense off of Amazon and wait for my expected ship date to be updated.

Complaint of the Week: Zoom Calls

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I cannot wait for this pandemic to be over and for the employees to go back into work. They’re not cut out for working online. They belong in the cubicle*, virtually and physically far from me.

If you want to escape the cubicle responsibly or if you’re responsibly socially distancing yourself from misinformation and need something to do, buy my relaunched book, Everyone’s Advice Is Wrong . . . Including Mine.

a laptop on a desk in front of a water bungalow

Guns & Butter: Pokhara, Nepal Travel Guide (Cautionary Edition)

Pokhara Nepal Travel Guide is part of the ANA, Take Me ‘Round the World Trip Report.


TPOL’s Guns & Butter Travel Guide is the best way to see as much as you can in as little time as possible. Here’s how it works – A trip is composed of two factors: Labor And Lazy. The opportunity cost (what is given up) for relaxing and being Lazy is gained by being adventurous in the form of Labor and vice versa. The guide includes inefficient activities i.e., tourist traps that should be avoided and aspirational activities that are worth doing but may be impossible to see given the constraints of time and resources.


Pokhara is by far better than Kathmandu (see Guns & Butter: Kathmandu Travel Guide (Bargaining Edition)). But I didn’t do or see all that I could while I was there. Thus, this guide is more of a warning than a play-by-play.

Warning #1: Monsoon Season 

Pokhara is only a short flight from Kathmandu if your plane gets off the ground (see Nepal Domestic Flight Misery). Some suggest taking a bus or hiring a driver to get there. That comes with its own set of problems (see OMAAT: The Hell Journey from Chitwan to Kathmandu). In general, I would advise traveling during the rainy season (see TPOL’s Travel Lessons), but sometimes it is unavoidable. Fortunately, the flight eventually took off (Yeti Airlines: Finally Taking Off from Kathmandu to Pokhara).

Warning #2: Don’t Play Golf 

I was mesmerized by this advertisement for golfing in the Himalayas. a poster with pictures of people playing golfDon’t fall for it. Here’s what it really looks like (see Rip-off Alert: Golfing in the Himalayas).

a man playing golf on a grassy hill

Warning #3: Paragliding (during Monsoon Season)

Weather really can interfere with plans. Initially, my paragliding trip was cancelled because of the rain. Then the rain stopped and I was able to have a great time (see Paragliding Pokhara: Born to Be Alive).

a man and woman in parachutes

This is just another chapter in my book of thrill-seeking activities (TPOL’s Biggest Fears: Some Conquered, Some Endure).

Warning #4: Bargaining 

I only put this as a warning if you don’t read the Souvenir Pricing Guide: Pokhara, Nepal and, more importantly, Master Bargainer: TPOL’s TIPS for Shopping Abroad.

a street with cars and people on it
Souvenir tee shirts don’t cost a fortune.

Warning #5: Accommodations 

I stayed at Big Pillow, a nice play for $40 a night. Could I have found a cheaper place? Absolutely. This warning comes from spending too much when there are cheaper options (see Frontier Hotel Darwin: My Case for Hostels) and for settling for a room for a few dollars thinking it will be the Chungking Mansions.

a bed with white sheets and towels on it

Warning #6: Doing No Research 

TPOL doesn’t plan ahead (see How to Book Trinidad’s Carnival Last Second for Free*). Usually, this works out. In Pokhara, not doing research was a mistake (see My Fault vs. This Place Sucks: How TPOL Grades Destinations). Had I spent even five minutes looking at why people go to Pokhara, I probably would have booked a 5-day Annapurna trekking trip to get a taste of the Himalayas. The full trek takes weeks, but this would have been sufficient and a better use of my time than playing golf.

Warning #7: Watch Your Weight 

Pokhara had some great food. Ordering double entrees and double appetizers and triple drinks for myself caught up to me quickly. But since I was not trekking, why would I pass up on momo, curry, and biryani? a bottle of beer and a glass on a table a table with food and beer on it a menu on a table a plate of food on a table a bowl of food with vegetables a bowl of brown soup a pizza with cheese and herbs a plate of dumplings with a small cup of sauce a plate of dumplings with sauce a plate of rice with sauce a bowl of food with white sauce and onions

I even ordered momo when I went for pizza.

a restaurant entrance with a sign and a man in a chef's hat a pizza with olives and cheese on a black counter a plate of dumplings with sauce

a man sitting at a table with a plate of food and a beer
The end result

Overall

Food and paragliding made Pokhara worth visiting. Trekking would have made it more special. Maybe next time when the Pokhara International Airport opens.

a sign on a dirt road

My Fault vs. This Place Sucks: How to Grade Destinations

Sucks vs. My Fault is part of the ANA, Take Me ‘Round the World Trip Report.


There are places in the world that suck. Phuket is a great example. Kuala Lumpur is another. I have no desire to go back to either of them. Then there are places that could be great but things did not go according to plan or there was not a good plan. I’m famous for winging it when I get on the ground, and usually I find my way (see How to Book Trinidad’s Carnival Last Second for Free*). That didn’t happen in Nepal. I came during rainy season which normally means there is a risk that rain may spoil my plans. I didn’t expect four days of a straight downpour. This set off a cascade of events. First, I hastily went through Kathmandu from sight to sight eager to get out of the rain and mud and with no patience to take in the sights (Guns & Butter: Kathmandu Travel Guide (Bargaining Edition)). Granted, I’m not a person who cares to see temple after temple, but better weather would have had me in better spirits. The curse of the rain forced my flight from Kathmandu to Pokhara to be cancelled (see Nepal Domestic Flight Misery). I ended up staying another night in Kathmandu, held up in the beautiful Hyatt Regency.

The risk of interminable bad weather forced me to book paragliding on an overcast day instead of waiting for a beautiful sunny one, though that still worked out (see Paragliding Pokhara: Born to Be Alive). When the day was sunny, I opted to go golfing in the Himalayas, something that sounds cooler than it really was (see Rip-off Alert: Golfing in the Himalayas).

Unlike Bhutan, where I not only pursued happiness but found it (see Guns & Butter: Bhutan Travel Guide (Happiness Edition)), I only made a superficial connection with Nepal. I should have planned a 5-day trek from Pokhora up to Annapurna base camp. However, prior to coming Bhutan, I didn’t know I liked trekking and didn’t know I was a natural mountain goat (see Finding Happiness: Tiger’s Nest (Bhutan Day 5)).

The combination of bad weather, poor planning, and not engaging in activities for which a country is known leaves me to blame for what could have been a better experience. In my defense, I did not give up. I could’ve cancelled my flight to Pokhara and remained a refugee at Hyatt. I could’ve stayed in Pokhara another night and wandered around the town getting fatter off of momo (see Guns & Butter: Pokhara, Nepal Travel Guide (Cautionary Edition)). Instead, I booked transport to Chitwan National Park to see the one-horned rhino. The drive took 3 hours from Pokhara followed by what was supposed to be another 4 hours to Kathmandu (see OMAAT: The Hell Journey from Chitwan to Kathmandu).

The takeaways from my rambling are the following:

Know the tourist attractions before visiting a country.

Do them.

Explore beyond that.

Then decide if a place is great or if it sucks.

Otherwise, you’ll have to return again and cover something you missed, something I don’t like doing because it means giving up another adventure. To that end, I’ll be back in Pokhara in 2022, when the international airport opens as I refuse to go to Kathmandu ever again.

TPOL’s TIP: The overused “off-the-beaten-path” line is only applicable once you’ve seen what’s on the path. There’s a reason why tourist attractions attract tourists.

a sign on a dirt road